I’m a progressive, liberal feminist woman—I’ve lived in San Francisco’s Castro district, walking side by side with naked residents exercising their right to free expression. And I’ve been to Folsom Street Fair (strictly as an observer). What I mean to say is that it takes a lot to shock me. Yet, even I was caught off guard at the vaginas and strap-on dildos on display in in the new rock documentary Peaches Does Herself, starring electro-punk artist, Peaches.

Born Merrill Beth Niske, Peaches’ (that’s her stage name) has been called shocking, vulgar, lewd and downright nasty. She has toured with Iggy Pop, protested in the streets for the band Pussy Riot and wrote an album protesting President George Bush titled, Impeach My Bush. Her music has also been featured in several movies including the 2003 hit Lost in Translation.

If you’ve never had the pleasure of attending a Peaches concert or listening to any of her four albums… beware! They are not for the faint of heart. Expect in your face sexuality and outlandish costumes. The movie is currently on the film festival circuit, screening at the recent San Francisco International Film Festival and will be making stops in Seattle, Buenos Aires, Chicago, Copenhagen and London—just to name a few.

Here’s the trailer:

I had a chance to interview Peaches on the red carpet at the San Francisco International Film Festival screening of her film. I wasn’t sure what to expect. Would she going prance down the red carpet in leather bondage? Would she even be wearing clothes? Would I need to avert my eyes? None of the above. Despite talking a mile a minute, Peaches was extremely genuine.

Here’s my interview with Peaches.

Peaches and Sandy Kane on the red carpet at the recent San Francisco International Film Festival.

KQED Pop: Peaches, it is such a pleasure to meet you. Thanks for chatting with me.
Peaches: Hellooooo radio world.

KQED Pop: Hellooooo Peaches. Your movie is a “rock-opera.” I saw the film this afternoon and noticed there wasn’t any dialogue. Can you tell me about that decision?
Peaches: Right, there isn’t dialogue. I wanted to take my four albums and create a narrative. An “anti-jukebox” musical.

KQED Pop: Are you a fan of musicals?
Peaches: I love musicals! I grew up on them.

KQED Pop: Really? What are some of your favorites?
Peaches: I love Busby Berkeley. I love Singin’ in the Rain and musicals from the 1950s.

KQED Pop: That’s surprising. What about Judy Garland? Does the infamous Peaches derive any inspiration from her work?
Peaches: I love Judy Garland, of course and the Wizard of Oz. But, I also grew up in the ’70s. At a very young age I saw things like Phantom of the Paradise, which is a Brian Depalma rocker version of Phantom of the Opera. I was also inspired by Rocky Horror Picture Show. And the 1970s British musical, Tommy, based on rock opera by The Who. Those films are embedded deep in me somewhere.

KQED Pop: Have you ever taken theater or film classes?
Peaches: I did. I actually studied theater directing. I went to college for that. Then I decided I didn’t want to do it.

KQED Pop: Why not?
Peaches: I didn’t want to have a heart attack by the time I was 30 if I had to think about all the sets and lighting and the actors. I would end up just yelling at people because I couldn’t handle everything.

KQED Pop: How did you go from theater directing to becoming the infamous, “Peaches.”
Peaches: I dropped out of college and ended up falling into music. I realized with music you can be the writer and director and do all those things I loved. I built the songs and then built the enhancement on top of it. For example, when I did Peaches Does Herself, it started as a stage show, and then became celebration of ten years of all the work I’m doing. We filmed it just to document it. Robin Thompson, who I work with, he filmed it and edited it in such a fantastic way that we realized we might actually have a film on our hands. We changed the ending to take it out of the stage and make it more like a film. That’s how it went.

KQED Pop: Watching your film reminded me very much of John Cameron Mitchell’s Hedwig and the Angry Inch. Especially because a few characters were gender ambiguous. Did that musical influence you in any way?
Peaches: Hello? (laughing) Yeah, yeah definitely. I love that you said that. It’s really cool to be associated with that movie. I just met John Cameron Mitchell. Both John and I are influenced by the same things. Hedwig definitely fits all into the same kind of genre. Another journalist said the same thing, too. He said maybe Peaches Does Herself is an exploration like Hedwig where there is a complete merge of both genders. So, maybe this is an exercise of what Hedwig is really like in practice.

KQED Pop: The movie has a shock quality to it like large vaginas on screen. Were you going for a shock quality?
Peaches: I made the decisions to put vaginas on stage because I was thinking of all the misconceptions that people see in me and think of my work. I decided I was going to go full on penis-vagina, vagina-penis. I am going to go all in it, not just break out of it. This was a celebration.

KQED Pop: Thank you so much. It’s been a pleasure.

Before Elton John, Michael Jackson, Madonna, Marilyn Manson, Lady Gaga and their epic stage and personal antics, there was Liberace, aka Mr. Showmanship, the original too-much celebrity, marinated in his own eccentricities.

Sunday, May 26 HBO premiers Behind the Candelabra (so titled because of Liberace’s trademark candelabra that he kept on his piano during shows), a film by Steven Soderbergh of Scott Thorson’s notorious, just re-released tell-all about his life as lover and plaything of the world famous pianist. The film, starring Michael Douglas as Liberace and Matt Damon as Thorson, took almost half a decade to produce but looks well worth the wait. The book is so filled with weird, jaw-dropping revelations about the over-the-top celebrity lifestyle Thorson shared with Liberace (matching fur capes and gold plated Rolls Royces to start… have I piqued your interest?) it’s almost not to be believed. Thankfully, our celebrity culture has evolved since the death of Liberace in 1987 to the point where we’ll believe just about anything (thank you, TMZ). Thorson met Liberace when he was 17 and was quickly brought into the 47 year-old entertainer’s entourage and personal life. Thorson quotes Liberace as saying he wanted to be “Father, brother and lover” to the younger man… guess which one took precedent? Here are some of the things we’re most looking forward to Sunday night when Soderbergh’s film premiers.

1. Matt Damon in a Speedo

The books details quite a lot of Thorson and Liberace’s sexual relationship; a more accurate title might actually be Beneath the Candelabra if you get my hint. The preview includes a few shots of Matt Damon, towheaded like we haven’t seen him since Good Will Hunting, getting out of one of Liberace’s Roman-bath-by-way-of-Palm-Springs pools in a very tiny speedo. So, clearly, let’s get more of that and I predict Emmy!

2. Debbie, Dearest

Hollywood legend Debbie Reynolds (Singin’ in the Rain and mother of Princess Leia herself, Carrie Fisher) was a friend of Liberace’s in real life (they shared an agent for their Vegas engagements) and now plays his domineering, religious mother Frances in the film. The icon of old show business razzle dazzle is dramatically unrecognizable in the role sporting a frumpy gray wig, glasses and not a sequin in sight (we assume all sequins in North America were diverted to Douglas’s wardrobe). If Reynold’s role is anything like Mama Liberace is portrayed in the book the 81 year-old glamour girl has a great Faye Dunaway opportunity to chew scenery. As Thorson says of Mrs. Liberace: “when she died, Lee (Liberace) didn’t shed a single tear but went to pieces a few months later at the death of one of his many poodles.” Don’t even bother chewing, Debbie: just swallow the scenery whole.

3. Speaking of Sequins

No movie about Liberace would be complete without recreations of some of those famously understated costumes from his stage wardrobe (see also his collection of hairpieces). Beads, ruffles, feathers, velvet, satin, sequins, furs, jewels: the man made Cher look like a Shinto nun by comparison. Also, apparently the rule for men wearing capes is as follows: capes are only allowable if you are a superhero or a world famous concert pianist. Here’s the best part of the Liberace wardrobe: in a head-to-toe white satin and ermine ensemble bedecked with more mirrors than the a NASA telescope, the man insisted on publicly playing it straight until the day he died from AIDS complications. I fear that for an entire generation of women over 80 this movie will be a rude awakening about the private life of a man they may still be holding torches for.

4. Making an Entrance

Liberace was just as famous for his elaborate entrances (like the one above where he’s driven onstage by the real Scott Thorson in a rhinestone studded Rolls Royce) as he was for his befurred and bejeweled wardrobe. Also, we hear he played the piano! We’ve never exactly been sure what all this has to do with Chopin and Beethoven but we’re excited to find out!

5. Michael Douglas As We’ve Never Seen Him Before

The Academy Award winning actor hasn’t had a role this good in years (thanks for trying, team behind Wall Street sequel but no thanks) and has never played so far against type. Over-the-top antics aside, Liberace was an enormously talented musician and captivating personality and we’re looking forward to seeing how Douglass channels his own brand of charisma into the role. We’re also seriously hoping his wife, fellow Academy Award winner Catherine Zeta Jones, gave him some pointers on just how to do that diva strut across the stage to his piano bench.

6. The Soundtrack

Like I said, somewhere in all of this is the story of a gifted musician. For proof of the talent behind the tacky, listen to Liberace playing the “14th Hungarian Rhapsody” by Liszt; he never would have had the opportunity to get that tacky if he hadn’t been that talented.

7. Rob Lowe Unable to Blink

HBO/Behind the Candelabra screen grab of Rob Lowe

The very handsome Rob Lowe underwent migraine inducing makeup (lots of pulling and scotch tape, we imagine) for his role as plastic surgeon to the stars, Dr. Jack Startz. Seriously, take a look, that’s Rob Lowe in there. Startz plays an important role in the book and we hope to see a lot of him in the film version. Well, maybe not see… don’t look directly at him, children. Startz allegedly told a young Thorson that cocaine was not addictive and allowed him to trade expensive pieces of jewelry for painkillers. And you thought your prescription drug plan was bad.

8. The Couple that Facelifts Together…

Well, in the case of Liberace and Thorson they do not actually stay together. Apparently, the relationship went sour around the time Thorson underwent some surgery by Dr. Startz at Liberace’s insistence that was supposed to make Thorson more closely resemble a young Liberace. I’m just going to repeat that so it can sink in: Liberace made his lover get plastic surgery on his face so he would look like him. I know, it doesn’t get any less weird the more you say it. Terrible to live through (I can only imagine) but fabulous to read about and hopefully see on screen! How fame and wealth corrupt and pervert even the gentlest of souls; and how the scorned heart seeks vengance, especially when the scorned is half of a celebrity coupling. Let’s just hope that Soderbergh’s film takes us on as wild a ride as its source material. I’ve got my sequined cape all ready for Sunday night!

Behind the Candelabra premiers Sunday, May 26 on HBO

Behind the Candelabra: My Life with Liberace by Scott Thorson is available through Tantor Media online and in stores now

James Franco at a recent book signing in Palo Alto. Image courtesy of Laura Soriano

Sometimes famous people are not satisfied just being famous for one reason. When this happens they often call in some reinforcements and decide to dip their toes in the lapping author-y waters. Since being an actor, reality star or celebutaunt comes so easily to them, becoming an author is the next logical career choice. Many choose to write what they know, which means they, usually along with a ghostwriter or two, pen their own autobiography. Some of these, life Keith Richard’s story Life or Betty White’s If You Ask Me (And I’m Sure You Won’t) make for compelling reading. While many others, including Vanilla’s Ice’s 1991 memoir Ice by Ice, are not as well received by the public. Lucky for us the is no shortage or ego amongst celebrities and this simple fact let’s us know that the insane celeb autobiography will never go out of style. If celebrities want to write but don’t have it in them to go for a full chapter-book, they tend toward children’s stories. John Lithgow, Jamie Lee Curtis, Julianne Moore and Billy Crystal have all enjoyed success as children’s authors. However, a few brave celebs have taken the plunge into full-blown fiction writing often times with hilarious consequences. With Goodreads.com as our guide, we take a look at some of the worst (best?) in celebrity-penned fiction.

9. Hilary Duff: Elixir

Rating: 3.59/5 stars

Released in June 2011, Duff’s debut novel is a real page-turner. This 334 page thriller follows photojournalist/daughter of rich people Clea Raymond as she and a mysterious, handsome stranger, bond and attempt to solve the mystery of her father’s disappearance. The New York Post proclaimed ”It has everything: romance and the supernatural; a globe-trotting Hillary Clinton-esque mom; characters with names like Sage and Clea…and a shout-out to Page-Six!” Sounds like this former child star took the good news in stride releasing Devoted, the second book in the Elixir series, in Novemeber 2012.

8. Lauren Conrad: L.A. Candy

Rating: 3.37/5 stars

Reality star/fashion designer/blonde girl Lauren Conrad decided to test her storytelling chops in this June 2009 release L.A. Candy. The first of a trilogy (oh boy!), L.A. Candy chronicles the tale of Jane Roberts, a young, beautiful woman who moves to LA and is cast in a reality TV show. I’m sure she had to dig deep to find the inspiration for this one. ”I didn’t take anything specifically that happened to me,” Conrad told MTV News in 2009. ”The only thing that I did was … it was a way to show not necessarily me but just the other side of being on a show like ours.” For her efforts, Conrad briefly earned a spot on the New York Times Best Seller list.

7. Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi: A Shore Thing

Rating: 3.21/5 stars

Everyone’s favorite pouf-head, Snooki, took her deep love for the Jersey Shore to the pages of her first novel, A Shore Thing, in 2011. Not surprisingly, the story details a wild summer at the Jersey Shore shared by two cousins with super Italian-sounding names. Most plot-summarizing quote from the book: “[The girls] soak up all that Seaside Heights, New Jersey, has to offer: hot guidos, cool clubs, fried Oreos, and lots of tequila.”

6. Macaulay Culkin: Junior

Rating: 3.21/5 stars

The party monster himself takes a crack at the novel. Here, Culkin surprises his readers when instead of a linear, coherent story, they receive a dizzying tumble through a wild mind. Clearly, Culkin doesn’t stray too far from his own life’s experience with childhood mega-stardom and family dysfunction when creating his character, Junior. Kirkus Reviews says, “With this audaciously empty mishmash of poems, letters, comics, etc., former child star Culkin (of Home Alone fame) has managed to lower the already low bar set for celebrity fiction.” Better luck next time, Mack.

5. Fabio: Wild

Rating: 3.00/5 stars

Though he’s normally accustomed to adorning the cover, male model/goose target Fabio took at stab at authoring with this 1997 novel, Wild. Set in sizzling hot Miami, Wild  chronicles the sexy exploits of A.J. Sutton, a maid who falls in love with the ruggedly handsome (and undoubtedly bronze-skinned) businessman Marcos Esteves. However, a shocking murder causes A.J. to flee in order to survive and forces her to choose between love and her fears. I’d go with love, if I were her. Unfortunately, most people agree that Fabio is better half-smiling on the covers of romance novels or selling faux butter than he is at writing. His amazon reviews are hilarious.

4. Nicole Richie: The Truth About Diamonds: A Novel

Rating: 2.97/5 stars

On the heels of former bestie Paris Hilton’s self-indulgent 2004 book Confessions of an Heiress: A Tongue-in-Chic Peek Behind the Pose, wild child Nicole Richie penned her first novel The Truth About Diamonds: A Novel, in 2006. I like that the title feels it’s necessary to mention that this is in fact a novel. Perhaps it was included to remind people since the entire book reads like a memoir of the rocker-celebutaunt’s real life. She includes a character named Nicole Richie. She seems really down to Earth.

3. Pamela Anderson: Star Struck: A Novel

Rating: 2.93/5 stars

Centerfold/Canadian Pamela Anderson released her first novel Star Struck: A Novel in May of 2005. Pam also felt the need to mention that her book was a novel in the title because, surprise, surprise, this “fictional” story reads a lot (identically) like Pam’s life with rocker Tommy Lee. If you’re in the market for a trashy page-turning modern romance, this could be the book for you. Put this in the “beach book” pile for summer reading, why dontcha.

2. James Franco: Palo Alto

Rating: 2.825 stars

I was really pulling for Yale PhD candidate and overall babe James Franco. I wanted his collection of short stories to be the best. Sigh. Alas, his 2010 collection of stories about misfit teens in Palo Alto reads a bit more like a sanctimonious memoir; a mesh of Jim Carroll and Bret Easton Ellis mixed with a dash of gore. The New York Times’ Joshua Mohr wrote, “As a writer, Franco needs to harness the skills he’s cultivated as an actor, mainly the ability to inhabit a consciousness independent of his own.” Sounds like this Jimmy F should heed that advice before he writes another book, or a tweet. At least he’s easy on the eyes.

1. Naomi Campbell: Swan

Rating: 2.67/5 stars

In an astonishing turn of events a short-tempered supermodel writes a fictitious novel about a mega-successful supermodel. I guess we can’t blame Naomi Campbell for writing (or convincing someone to write for her) what she knows. If we did, she’d probably throw a phone at us or something. Swan has a plot, I think. Critics are torn. Many loathe it for being a rambling stream of incoherent events while others see it as an inspiring look at the world of modeling. It’s basically a foggy, fictional version of America’s Next Top Model written in 1994.

Naomi is going to be tough to beat but I’m certain countless more celebrities will inadvertently throw their hat in the ring for the Most Entertainingly Terrible Celebrity Author. Who is your favorite or least favorite celebrity author? Bonus points if you say Danica McKeller.

Book cover photos via Barnes and Noble and Amazon.

Rosalynn Carter and Jimmy Carter with Barbara Walters in 1978/Wikipedia Commons

Barbara Walters has been on television my entire life. Actually, she’s been on a lot longer than that, but my point is that I never had to live in a Nielsen world without her gentle, rounded R’s soothing me through a national crisis. Come this time next year, I’ll have to adjust. After weeks of speculation the news veteran, who has interviewed everyone from Sadat to Putin (and the most watched interview of all time, with former White House intern Monica Lewinsky), announced her plans to retire from television in 2014 on her show The View. Walters, 83, stressed that her retirement had nothing to do with her health (she’s had heart surgery and a recent bout of dangerous adult chicken pox in the last year) and that the decision was hers.

There are all kinds of reasons we’ll miss Barbara Walters on television and perhaps all kinds of reasons we won’t but there are two undeniable facts her retirement forces us to confront. First, Walters is among the last journalistic ties we have to the pioneering, early days of television news that’s still on the air: Murrow, Brinkley and Cronkite were the power players when Walters made a place for herself in the male dominated world of television news fifty years ago. More importantly, looking at the landscape of television and women in media the world seems to exist in a BBW and ABW context: Before Barbara Walters and After Barbara Walters. Before Barbara  Walters women on television news were weather girls, gal Fridays and mostly ran second to their male anchors. After Barbara Walters, women are (more) equal participants in how the news is made and reported.

1976 ABC News Anchors Harry Reasoner, Barbara Walters, Howard K. Smith/Wikipedia Commons

It will be said many times in the next year as ABC plans retrospectives, celebrations and countless “best of” specials but Barbara Walters opened the doors to the then boys-only club of television news, and while she was squeezing through whatever opening she could make for herself, other women followed. The stories of her triumphs over a system stacked against her are legendary and seem absurd now in their antiquated misogyny. When she first arrived on NBC’s Today Show in the 1960s, women on the program were still referred to as “Today Girls.” But by the time Walters left for ABC in the late ’70s they were co-hosts, a first for any woman on the network. When Walter’s left NBC to co-anchor the ABC Evening News (another first, one that Walters is often overlooked for in favor of Katie Couric’s solo hosting duties on CBS three decades later) she had a notoriously poor relationship with co-anchor Harry Reasoner, one for the time and the place it’s fair to say was colored by sexist resentment.

Even the often-parodied, frequently SNL-spoofed and cause of occasional personal hand-banging against the wall that is The View was a significant first: a show created by Walters for women and by women (remember her first season voice over? “I’ve always wanted to do a show with women of different generations, backgrounds and views: well, be careful what you wish for…”). Then there are her journalistic “gets:” sitting presidents, movie stars, legendary artists, foreign heads of state, spiritual leaders, embattled celebrities in every field ready to confess their sins on 20/20. Walters practically invented the on air confession as a necessary step in public redemption: I’ll feel a twinge when the first politician gets caught cheating on his wife after Walters retires and he’s forced to confess details to… oh God, it hurts me to say this, Piers Morgan.

Barack Obama on The View/Wikipedia Commons

If Murrow, Cronkite and Brinkley once calmed America in times of crisis with a paternal air of authority in her career Walters developed, if not exactly a maternal presentation during the breaking stories of our times, a very female one that was as key to our stability as viewers as the contributions of any male anchor. I always thought of Walters a sort of no-nonsense, old moneyed aunt: you had to be on your best behavior with her but if you were clever and worthy of it, she’d warm up during an interview and maybe reward you with a few laughs. When Princess Diana died in 1997, my family was watching the news coverage with Walters: in a moment that defined for me her special kind of human interest reporting she asked one of her co-anchors if there had been any word from Buckingham Palace about Diana’s young sons, who were on holiday in Scotland at the time of the crash. Maybe earlier in her career Walters had to fight for and insist on her authority but as the landscape of television changed, she was able to take a role as elder stateswoman: in the trenches when she needed to be, waiting for the big interviews to come to her and, by creating shows like The View (and inspiring its imitators) continuing to make opportunities for the women that would follow her and one day take her place.

Chris Meloni as Elliot Stabler in Law & Order: SVU

It seems to me that just about everyone has a little crush on Christopher Meloni. Maybe it’s his unique body of work that sets him apart. Or maybe it’s his intense, searing stare. Sure, he might not have strong name recognition like our old standbys George Clooney and Brad Pitt, but that’s not stopping boys and girls everywhere from loving Meloni. I’ve done some field research on the subject including but not limited to performing my own Law and Order: SVU marathon(s) and having several lengthy conversations with friends on the subject. More than one of us has stayed home on a weekend night just to watch SVU, due in no small part to needing a heavy dose of lead Detective Elliot Stabler, played by the charming Christopher Meloni. But his years cleaning up the mean streets of NYC alongside Mariska Hargitay–sadly, now over–are not the only reason we keep coming back for more. If you can’t handle the wait until his next movie, Man of Steel, comes out (June 14), here is a collection of some of Chris’ most dynamic and compelling roles to help fill the gap in your heart.

 1. Chris Keller: Oz

As Chris Keller in Oz, Meloni isn’t afraid to tackle serious subjects. Brooding, maniacal yet somehow enchanting, Chris Keller is a role Meloni really sinks his teeth into. Keller explores his sexuality and self-loathing in equal measure and Meloni’s performance throughout the HBO series is mesmerizing. He beautifully and effortlessly depicts Keller’s complex torment. The kid’s got chops.

2. Sven: Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas & 3. Gene: Wet Hot American Summer

It’s not always the leading men that steal the scene. In Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Meloni plays long-haired sass-pot Sven, the Flamingo Hotel desk clerk though his role is uncredited.  While in Wet Hot American Summer, he plays Gene, camp cook and strange habit having Vietnam vet. I had the privilege of seeing this performance happen live at last year’s SF Sketchfest and I can personally attest to Meloni’s brilliant comic timing. Gene the cook and his oddball one-liners have helped Wet Hot American Summer secure its forever place in cult movie heaven.

4. Johnny Gunn; 1st & Ten: The Championship

In 1984, years before hitting the cell-block in Oz, Chris Meloni starred alongside OJ Simpson as Johnny Gunn in 1st & Ten: The Championship, a sports comedy about a fictional California football team. Here, while wearing a gold chain and sans shirt, he defends the honor of the King, Elvis Presley. It’s this kind of shirtless acting that really allows us to follow in love with Chris and all of his skills. What range!

5. Guy in a McDonald’s Ad

Like most actors, Christopher Meloni has had to pay his dues. That means acting in commercials during the early stages of his career. Luckily for us (and for him) he found a way to make the most odd McDonald’s campaign in the ’80s endearing. Listen as he explains all the reasons why this woman shouldn’t date him just to get her to practically beg for a date. Oh that Chris, always get them eating out of his hand.

6. As Himself

An successful actor must also learn to navigate the media. Press junkets and the like can be tedious but Christopher Meloni always seems to be a good sport. Even when interviewed/attempted seduced by known frog-lover Miss Piggy, Meloni keeps his cool. I also like to imagine that his cell phone really does have a Law and Order style “dun-dun” as it’s custom ring tone. That notion helps me sleep at night.

It’s this kind of light-hearted approach to ordinary life that makes Meloni so magnetic. He’s the man we want to be or want to be with, on some level. He’s strong, he’s handsome, he’s not afraid to kiss a man on screen. He’s the best, and we love him. What’s your favorite Meloni moment?

/doandroidsdance.com

A week ago I was driving home with friends from a hike to Alamere Falls in Point Reyes and had been listening to some Joni Mitchell, some Phosphorescent, a little Bob Marley, perfect tunes for the sunny weather. The hike itself was about eight miles in total, moderately rocky terrain and glimpses of the ocean, much needed time to rejuvenate. Almost as soon as the radio was voted on in the car, I heard a chorus full of singable hooks, the voice indisputably that of Justin Timberlake. It was “Mirrors” from his latest half-LP The 20/20 Experience. I’ve never been a Timberhead and can go so far as to say I didn’t even know he was making music anymore. It’s been seven years since his last album, and now after taking that time to explore, he is back to what he does best. A celebrity or an artist, just like everyone else, deserves the right to a hiatus, a gap year, or in Justin’s case, years.

When Justin was 11, he made his first appearance on Star Search and spent two years on The Mickey Mouse Club alongside megahits Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera and Ryan Gosling. At a very young age, it was clear to Justin (or to his parents) what his dreams were, what his talents were, and how to capitalize. When watching old footage of Justin he doesn’t seem too awkward like many child actors forced into the business by their parents, pupils dilated on the verge of tears, Justin seems to be a natural, genuinely enjoying himself, someone—and I hate to say it—born to entertain (e.g. River Phoenix, Shirley Temple, Drew Barrymore). From that Star Search performance, it’s clear this little guy can sing but when starting so young and burning so bright, is it inevitable the—ahem—little star will burn out? Someone like Justin did not have the run-of-the-mill childhood but he is still a human and humans like to check out their options.

For as ubiquitous as he is, Justin only has three full-length albums. I was surprised myself when doing the research. After the huge success of FutureSex/LoveSounds in 2006, Justin split off the music scene for a good amount of time. It’s crazy to imagine someone at the height of their popularity in one artistic medium, raking in millions, pulling the proverbial plug. It would be like Michael Jordan playing baseball or Joaquin Phoenix becoming a rapper… oh wait. We definitely saw Justin in those seven years but not necessarily with a microphone in his hand. As Napster-found Sean Parker in The Social Network, he proved he could definitely cut it as a dramatic actor. As Beyonce’s backup dancer in an SNL skit for “Single Ladies,” he proved he could cut it as a comedian. He was doing his thing and doing it well, just not in a recording studio.

What we come to expect from artists is once they give us something spectacular we want them to give us more and even more than that. And when we don’t get it, the artist either becomes iconic or simply an iconic joke. To keep in the music realm, take for example a band like My Bloody Valentine. Some would argue the band’s 1991 album Loveless as one of the best records of all time, defining not only a decade but a generation of kids, and over the likes of Radiohead and Nirvana. I’m talking big deals here. How does a band follow genius with bigger genius and do we denounce them if we get nothing? My Bloody Valentine became iconic and 22 years in 2013 they released the follow up to Loveless, picking up right where they left off. On the other side of the coin is—and I may get some slack from my gay community for this one—Britney. Her hiatus didn’t quite work as well. In the mid-2000s, we followed Britney from meltdown to meltdown and had to bear witness to one of the most superbly terrible “comebacks” in pop culture history: her 2007 MTV Music Awards performance of “Gimme More,” where she appeared sedated like a sleepy puppy. Britney has become an iconic joke. I understand it might not be fair to compare little shoegaze pioneers with the enormous fame of a pop act but both took breaks and one just worked out better than the other.

With Justin, he not only traveled different career pathways, he also fell in love, which is something we both tend to forget about celebrities, that they have families just like you and me. Recently I was in a pizzeria and the man behind the counter was ringing me up and checking his phone at the same time. When he saw no one called, he put his phone on the counter and we finished our transaction. As I turned out the door, I saw the wallpaper on his homescreen was a picture of what I assume to be his wife and children. And my heart melted. Of course he has a wife and of course he has children! Our meaningless interaction just became human, super human. We engage with celebrities and artists because they entertain us, we want something from them, but like US Weekly says: They’re Just Like Us!

Justin is just like us. We return to what we know, what we’re good at, and what can help us keep moving forward with our lives. But not without exploring other options. In his latest single “Mirrors,” he sings: and I’ll tell you, baby / it was easy coming back into you once I figured it out / you were right here all along. Sometimes you have to just take a break from tackling the city and go out and conquer the forest and the sea.

Kriss Kross/Sony

Tonight’s saddest story is: Chris Kelly, “Mac Daddy” of the ’90s rap group Kris Cross, died of a possible drug overdose. He was only 34.

I grew up without a TV but even I knew Kris Kross and liked to sing, “Jump! Jump!” at every opportunity and wear my pants backwards occasionally, to the consternation of the adults in my life. Really, what an amazing and hilariously tame form of youthful rebellion that Kris Kross cultivated with their signature backwards clothing style. Of course, it was probably a producer somewhere that came up with the idea, since the boys (the group was him and the other Chris, Chris Smith, “Daddy Mac”) were all of 14 when they hit the scene in 1992. And if he really did die of a drug overdose, then we might want to think about that, what our culture’s obsession with kid stars is doing to the kids, seemingly all the time. Whatever happend, 34 is too young to die without it being a tragedy. Tonight Facebook is lit up with this video but if you haven’t seen it, watch now. And if you have, watch again. RIP Chris. May we remember your sacrifice when we jump to your song and scream along with the lyrics at weddings and dances for the rest of our lives.

Sarah Polley, a.k.a. Ramona Quimby/Oscar-nominated director/our Canadian girlfriend, stopped by the KQED studios for an episode of Forum and we just couldn’t let her slip away without asking her a few questions. Polley told us about being in love with San Francisco, her go-to karaoke jams, being a bad ass, and what it feels like for a child star.

If you want more Sarah Polley, make sure to listen to her Forum episode and see her new documentary, Stories We Tell, which opens May 10, 2013!

I almost gave up on music. Seriously. About to completely sever my ties to the world of iTunes, Spotify and iHeartradio. I truly couldn’t listen to another Pitbull, Bruno Mars or Rihanna song.

Don’t get me wrong. I love me some hip-hop when running on the treadmill or sipping a cocktail at the latest Mission district bar. Yes, even I with two left feet have been known to “Harlem Shake” every now and then. Hey, if Anderson Cooper can do it, so can I. Usually after a few of those Mission-district adult beverages.

But, there had to be something else. Something to make me love music again.

Music with a purpose. Music that enticed me to stomp those two *left* feet. I was seeking. I was searching.

Enter my introduction to Shannon (drums, harp, vocals), Spence (lead guitar, vocals)  Aaron (bass guitar, vocals) and Elliot (Rhodes piano, organ) of the San Francisco-based band, The Stone Foxes.

I met these fine gentleman at the KQED studios recently. My job was to profile artists that sing about California. I found my group.

Never heard of them? Oh, don’t worry. You will. This blues-rock band is coming to a small venue near you. May 4, Fillmore. Be there.

Before I go on, it’s time to clear my conscience.

Gina’s Shameless Confession #1: I have since developed a secret crush on The Stone Foxes. They rock my world…and my iPod. Guess it’s not a secret anymore.

Now, now. I promise. This is not some crazy-stalker obsession. According to the Wikipedia gods, “celebrity worship syndrome” is an obsessive-addictive disorder in which a person becomes overly involved with the details of a celebrity’s personal life. Don’t worry Shannon. I promise I won’t be peering into your bedroom window with binoculars. Well, at least not while I’m writing this blog post….

Gina’s Shameless Confession #2: I rock out to them in the shower, singing along with my less-than-American Idol voice. Why? Because they are cool. Why else? There’s just something about hot water and an audience of one, usually my pug staring at me, head tilted and howling, that makes me sound so much better.

Now that that’s off my chest…..

Brothers Shannon and Spence Koehler each have a unique style. If you saw them in a crowd, you probably wouldn’t guess they’re related.

A co-worker commented Shannon reminds her of the old Brawny Paper Towel guy.

Remember him? Outdoorsy, lumberjack heartthrob? (Not the most recent clean-shaven, revamped Brawny 2.0 version with a Queer-Eye makeover).

I could see her point. Shannon’s got a rough exterior, fair skin, blond hair and a mountain man-esque quality. I could just as easily see him playing drums as chopping wood with a large hatchet.

I ran the Brawny man description by the Foxes and it spawned a cacophony of laughter. Apparently, all the members have nicknames. Shannon’s include “Big Thumb” and “Charlie Meatloaf.” Spence is known as “Tim Lincecum, before he lost those long locks. Aaron is playfully called “Midget” “Elf,” or anything else reflecting his vertical challenges. (Although, he reminds me much more of a young Joe Pesci or a Jersey Boys cast member). And Elliot.—he’s referred to simply as “The Dentist.” Why? That’s as unclear as Mr. Big Thumb Charlie Meatloaf’s moniker, but one thing is perfectly clear, these guys all have fun.

But, back to Spence  for a moment–he’s different than Shannon. Long, dark hair, black rimmed glasses that Shannon sometimes wears in jest. He’s also more soft-spoken than his brother.

When these two unseemingly related men get together, the familial relationship becomes obvious. Shannon likes to play jokes. Spence is usually the brunt of it. Yet, the brothers are in complete harmony with each other both in life and on stage.

“Yeah, he gets on my nerves sometimes,” Spence said. “But we’re best friends.”

Aaron Mort, longtime band member, confessed he’s been witness to several acts domestic battery between the siblings. Don’t worry. It’s more brotherly love type violence….and it sometimes involves cooking utensils.

“I’d call it Saturday morning cartoon violence. Shannon will grab a spatula and the fun begins,” Aaron said.

I learned a lot more during my interview. The Koehler brothers were destined for musicianhood from an early age.

The boys started playing music together when they were wee lads in a place called “Toll House.” Like a character from a Mark Twain novel, they lived a classic American childhood. Think dirt roads, farms, a fishin’ hole and ye ole’ general store.  The nearest neighbor was 20 minutes away.

To put this in perspective, the unincorporated town is 220 miles from San Francisco, east of Fresno.

“We grew up on 40 acres of rolling hills,” Shannon recalls. “There was no going out to get ice cream. Mom said no video games. All we could do is play in the creek and play music.”

No, this isn’t the town that spawned those sinfully delicious chocolate chip cookies you find sitting in your pantry. Apparently they get that question a lot.

Even the town’s name is a misnomer—no toll roads. Starbucks and McDonalds have never soiled their land. There’s one gas station with one pump and one post office. Yep, these are a people of tradition, high up in the Sierra Nevada. A rugged sense of individualism defines their culture.

With this backdrop, the boys began playing music in middle school. Then, their dreams expanded.

The Koehler brothers moved to San Francisco for college and experienced extreme culture shock. They were wowed by the big buildings, the nostalgia and  the iconic baseball team.

But, they noticed something else. Homelessness. Everywhere. Not just homelessness and poverty, but a complacency towards the individual, the human aspect of the person sleeping on the sidewalk.

Shannon would walk by the same homeless man every day. And every day he would just pass him by without acknowledging his presence.

“We see a lot of people just going to work everyday,” he said. “Folks are reaching out in need and we just walk right past them. Our eyes don’t divert to them. We just make a beeline to work.”

He started feeling desensitized. The band began to thrive. They cut two albums and were achieving success playing such venues as the Stern Grove Festival and Outside Lands.

But, the memory of that homeless man was etched into Shannon’s psyche. That feeling compelled him to compose the lyrics to my favorite song on the newest album, “Goodnight Moon.”

“The song is the story of someone who is trying to find a place to sleep,” he said. “He may be suffering from some mental illness. Maybe he gets lost and can’t make it to a shelter so he ends up sleeping on a sidewalk.”

Brawny, Lincecum, Pesci and the Dentist didn’t just write a song. They took several steps further. They’ve partnered with the non-profit SuperFood Drive to help alleviate hunger.

This spring they’ve been on tour from Fresno, where it all began, to New York City. At each show they’ve asked fans to bring healthy, non-perishable foods to help those in need. The food then gets donated to a local food bank. They want to raise awareness and action around healthier communities, especially low-income and homeless people.

Oh, and the band volunteers at a homeless shelter.

There are so many more reasons I fell in love with The Stone Foxes.

Perhaps it’s because one of their songs, “Beneath Mt. Sinai” is on my favorite television show, Sons of Anarchy. Season 2, Episode 204, “Eureka” episode.

Or maybe it’s because the guys love ice cream. Ice cream. Yes! I love ice cream too! Shannon, marry me! We can have an ice cream wedding cake. Kidding. Only kidding…..

But mostly, I dig these guys because they are genuine. Because they care and are humble to their success.

Also, because they are my screensaver on my iPad. Oh, and my phone. Also my computer. At work…and at home. They are my ringtone. My Facebook cover photo. That’s not excessive, right? Right? Oh boy. Maybe Wikipedia was onto something.

High: President Obama’s Opening Line

Entering to DJ Khaled’s “All I Do Is Win” (featuring Snoop Dog, er, Lion, T-Pain and conservative bete noir Ludacris), President Obama set the tone for his time at the podium. “How do you like my new entrance music? Rush Limbaugh warned you about this second term, baby. We’re changing things around here a little bit.” Anytime you start out the night by making fun of conservative talk radio’s fear of “the rap music,” you’re off to a good start.

Low: President of the White House Correspondents Association Ed Henry’s Breast Feeding Riff

There are some things men should just shy away from making jokes about. Anything having to do with women’s bodies is a good place to start. In one of the evening’s more bizarre and distasteful moments, Ed Henry went on a misguided tangent in his remarks about Fox News helping to implement Obama Care (Henry is an employee of Fox News) by finding a space to turn into a breastfeeding room in the White House press offices as stated by the health care law. Imagine your uncle talking about your first period at a family reunion and you’ll experience the same level of creeped out everyone watching did.

High: House of Cards

The mix of real Washington insiders and cast members from Kevin Spacey’s House of Cards earned the most laugh out loud moments of the night among the guests in the Hilton ballroom. Cutting, but not too cutting, the fake episode of the hit show reminded us how good Spacey is when he’s bad.

Low: The Washington D.C. Hilton

Really WHCA, you HAVE to have this dinner at the Hilton every year? I hate to sound like a snob but…come on, a Hilton? ACTUAL PROMS are held at better hotels. Plus, we just don’t like thinking that Paris Hilton is some how benefiting from this…she is the antithesis of nerd prom.

High: President Obama Jokes About Satan (and it totally worked!)

Remember the History Channel Antichrist that some people thought looked a little too much like a certain leader of the free world? We’d forgotten too, but President Obama got the last laugh. “The History Channel is not here. I guess they were embarrassed about the whole Obama-is-a-devil thing,” he said. “Of course, that never kept Fox News from showing up. They thought that comparison was not fair … to Satan.” Runner up best line by the President: “I look in the mirror and I have to admit, I’m not the strapping young Muslim socialist that I used to be.” Zing, Mr. President, Zing.

Low: Bill O’Reilly’s Face

You knew you were on camera; you couldn’t even attempt to crack a smile, Mr. Falafel? Not even once? The entire Fox News table needs to take a cue from Comedy Central roastees at these dinners and politely feign laughter and then bitch about it later at the after party.

High: Coco’s Cool Tonight Show Humor

Conan O’Brien put any jokes about his short tenure at the Tonight Show to rest with the following: “The president is hard at work creating jobs. Since he was first elected, the number of popes has doubled. The number of Tonight Show hosts has tripled. Congratulations.” And congratulations to you, Conan, way to turn that pain into art!

Low: Duck Dynasty

If any A&E celebrities were going to attend this event I was hoping for either Dog the Bounty Hunter, a couple of past Intervention participants (just keep them away from the bar) or the cast of Bates Motel. I’m just not into these Duck Dynasty people. The title of the show had me hoping it was going to be an all water fowl remake of the ’80s nighttime soap Dynasty and I’ve been let down ever since.

High: Daniel Day Lewis is Obama…is…Daniel Day Lewis

The hysterical faux Spielberg biopic has Daniel Day Lewis cast as the 44th president (“the answer was right in front of me all along,” Spielberg said). Just when you thought this could go terribly wrong, there was the actual 44th president AS Daniel Day Lewis talking about the challenges of playing…HIMSELF. Very meta, very funny.

Low: A painfully underused Tracy Morgan

If you’re going to cast loose cannon Tracy Morgan as loose cannon Joe Biden, do SOMETHING with him. What’s less than a cameo? A pop-up? On second thought, maybe it was best for Spielberg to restrict Morgan’s appearance to a minimum. Or maybe this was all the coherent footage they could get out of him.

High: Anderson and Rachel

Conan O’Brien comparing the relationship between President Obama and Speaker of the House John Boehner to a blind date between gay Anderson Cooper and lesbian Rachel Maddow. “It’s no surprise Speaker Boehner isn’t here tonight. In theory, they understand each other’s positions. But deep down you know nothing’s ever going to happen.” Pitch perfect Coco classic.

Low: Why can’t Joe Biden come?

We know, we know, it’s a security risk to have both President and Vice President at the same event (I can only imagine the security risk of having them at a Hilton at all), but I think we’re missing the best comedy of all by excluding the VP. By the end of the term, shouldn’t he at least get to Skype in and answer back for the eight years of jokes at his expense?