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Made to be a portable version of a calming physical space in Kist’s early childhood education classroom, these small plastic pencil boxes hold everything Kist’s students need throughout the day to practice \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/62194/is-social-emotional-learning-effective-new-meta-analysis-adds-to-evidence-but-debate-persists\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">self-regulation and emotional identification\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Developed when Kist’s classroom went virtual after the onset of covid, “little safe place” boxes are now a mainstay for Kist’s three to five year-old students. Each student is provided with their own box and practices self-regulating breathing techniques, \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/58790/why-kindness-and-emotional-literacy-matters-in-raising-kids\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">providing compassion and empathy towards others\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, and labeling and expressing their emotions throughout the school day.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kist, an early childhood educator with 27 years of experience, works at a school that follows the \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://consciousdiscipline.com/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Conscious Discipline\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> framework, which is rooted in social-emotional learning and trauma-informed practices, and \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://teachingstrategies.com/product/the-creative-curriculum-for-preschool/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Creative Curriculum\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a project-based early learning framework. Her school also encourages building a “school family” in order to foster safety and connection among the students, faculty and staff. For Kist, a big part of providing safety and connection in her classroom comes from \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61233/why-cultivating-emotional-intelligence-among-toddlers-has-become-more-urgent\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">helping young learners identify and process their emotions\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, and “little safe place” boxes are a tool for that.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“Being aware of your emotions is the first step in learning how to regulate them,” said \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://parentingtranslator.substack.com/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Cara Goodwin\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a child psychologist and author of the \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/tag/parenting-translator\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Parenting Translator newsletter\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. Identifying and \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/62501/want-your-kids-to-be-happier-and-healthier-start-talking-with-them-about-uncomfortable-emotions\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">expressing emotions\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> are “essential for the development of empathy and for maintaining healthy social relationships,” Goodwin continued.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>“Little safe place” boxes\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kist starts the school year by introducing her young students to the four basic emotions: happy, sad, angry and scared. She spends a week on each one, starting with happiness, and uses books, songs, and other classroom visuals as learning aids. Kist continues like this until students are well acquainted with the concepts inside of the “little safe place” boxes. Then she distributes a box to each child.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_63571\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-63571\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-800x1067.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"1067\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-800x1067.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-1020x1360.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-160x213.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-768x1024.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-1152x1536.jpg 1152w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-1536x2048.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-scaled.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Jenny Kist created a “My Little Safe Place” box for every student in her early childhood classroom. It contains tools for emotional identification and regulation. \u003ccite>(Courtesy of Jenny Kist)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">After that, each morning Kist guides students through using the different tools in their boxes. They take out a card that has faces for the four basic feelings and mark which feeling they identify with that morning. Then, the children take out their breathing strategy card, which has four different icons that indicate different breathing strategies that they have learned. The boxes also have a card in them that remind the students of what Kist calls “I love you” rituals – nursery rhymes with the lyrics changed and designed to help students with attachment and connection. Students practice an “I love you” ritual one-on-one with a classroom adult each morning.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kist’s “little safe place” boxes are modeled from the self-regulation and emotional identification tools in the “safe place” corner of her classroom, an area that also contains a rug and pillows to comfort students. In a moment of dysregulation, whether the student is using the box or the safe place corner, a classroom adult can guide them to use these tools to recognize and move through their emotions. Each student also has a family photo in their box. “\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/63086/when-family-tree-projects-frustrate-students-community-maps-are-an-inclusive-alternative\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Connections to home\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> are just so helpful if they’re upset about anything,” said Kist.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Learning to identify emotions\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Identifying emotions is a complex process. For young children the first steps in this process are learning to recognize facial expressions, tone of voice and body language, according to Goodwin, the child psychologist. They also need to learn to label those context clues with language.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">According to Goodwin, children should be able to identify emotions by around three or four years old. Although most children will learn how to identify emotions naturally through social interaction, parents and educators can facilitate that learning. “The biggest thing you can do is just talk about emotions,” she said. Taking opportunities to talk about and label your own emotions or the emotions expressed in a children’s TV show or book can be helpful. It is also helpful for parents and educators to label emotions that a child is expressing for them so that “in the future they can then learn to label it themselves,” Goodwin said.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">To help students \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/62290/teaching-kids-the-right-way-to-say-im-sorry\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">build empathy\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, Goodwin recommends parents and educators ask young children what a character in a book or tv show might be feeling, and why they might be feeling that way. One activity that Goodwin has found useful in her personal and professional life is “\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://rainbowdays.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Rainbow-Days-SEL-Resource-Feelings-Charades-on-website.pdf\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">feeling charades\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.” In this game, both children and adults act out a feeling, while the other participants guess what feeling they are expressing. Feeling charades can also be played with puppets or toys.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Learning to regulate emotions\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In Kist’s classroom, students practice emotional regulation strategies throughout the day, not just when there’s a peer conflict or an individual child is distressed. “You can’t teach it when they’re in the middle of it,” Kist said. When a child is upset, she takes time to acknowledge the student’s feelings, reflect back to them what their face is expressing and suggest an emotion that they might be feeling. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kist’s students also practice different breathing techniques throughout the day. \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/63039/to-help-students-deal-with-trauma-this-school-holds-mindfulness-lessons-over-the-loudspeaker\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Breathing exercises can be helpful for self-regulation\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, but young children need concrete explanations, so the techniques Kist uses have a symbol, such as a star or a balloon. The visual reminders are printed on a small laminated page in their “little safe place” box. When a student needs to access deep breathing, they can pull out their breathing card and choose an exercise. Kist and her students also make up their own breathing exercises, always involving a physical aspect like deep breathing while swinging their leg to kick an imaginary ball.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_63512\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-63512 size-medium\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-800x600.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"600\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-800x600.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-1020x765.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-160x120.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-768x576.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-1536x1152.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-2048x1536.jpg 2048w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-1920x1440.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">The “safe place” corner of Jenny Kist’s classroom contains a rug and pillows to comfort students, as well as tools to help them identify and process their feelings. \u003ccite>(Courtesy of Jenny Kist)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Goodwin suggested encouraging children to breathe in through their nose and out through their mouth by pretending to smell a flower and blow out a candle. This can be given as a verbal explanation, but can also be helped by using fake flowers and candles, or even drawings for children to reference. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Goodwin also uses \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RiMb2Bw4Ae8\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">belly breathing\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, where young children put their hands on their bellies as they breathe to feel how their abdomen expands and contracts with each breath, as well as \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FKdApTxsDP0\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">five-finger breathing\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, where children trace their fingers on one hand with the index finger on their other hand as they take slow breaths, one per finger. Teaching these techniques can be frustrating because kids at this age are easily distracted and learning these skills for the first time. It “just takes like a lot of modeling,” and “a lot of reminding,” said Goodwin.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>COVID-19 origins and ongoing impact\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kist originally created the “my little safe place” boxes when the early learning center went virtual in spring 2020 because of the COVID-19 pandemic. During the unfamiliar experience of virtual learning, she wanted to find a way to provide a portable and accessible version of the safe space corner for each student.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Initially, not every student was given a “little safe place” box. But as she saw how helpful they were to the students that she had given them to during at home learning, Kist decided that every student in her classroom should have one. Since incorporating the boxes in her in-person classroom, she has seen students bring other students their boxes in moments of dysregulation. She has also seen some of her young learners singing their “I love you” nursery rhymes with each other unprompted.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">According to Goodwin, we don’t yet have enough data to determine if distance learning had \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61310/are-the-pandemic-babies-and-kids-ok\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">any long-term effects\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> on young children’s ability to identify and process emotions, but she is encouraged by the knowledge that children’s brains are very plastic. There is a sensitive period for developing the skills to process emotions, but that “doesn’t mean that’s the only time you can learn those skills,” Goodwin said. At the same time, she added, it doesn’t hurt for parents and educators to focus on educating young children on emotional and social emotional skills that they may have missed out on during the early years of the pandemic.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"In Jenny Kist's preschool classroom, small plastic pencil boxes hold everything kids need to practice self-regulation and emotional identification.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1713272775,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":19,"wordCount":1500},"headData":{"title":"Young Children Need Help Identifying Emotions. “Little Safe Place” Boxes Give Them Tools. | KQED","description":"In Jenny Kist's preschool classroom, small plastic pencil boxes hold everything kids need to practice self-regulation and emotional identification.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":"","socialDescription":"In Jenny Kist's preschool classroom, small plastic pencil boxes hold everything kids need to practice self-regulation and emotional identification."},"sticky":false,"excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","articleAge":"0","path":"/mindshift/63506/young-children-need-help-identifying-emotions-little-safe-place-boxes-give-them-tools","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">When Jenny Kist’s students walk through the classroom door every morning, they take out their “little safe place” boxes. Made to be a portable version of a calming physical space in Kist’s early childhood education classroom, these small plastic pencil boxes hold everything Kist’s students need throughout the day to practice \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/62194/is-social-emotional-learning-effective-new-meta-analysis-adds-to-evidence-but-debate-persists\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">self-regulation and emotional identification\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Developed when Kist’s classroom went virtual after the onset of covid, “little safe place” boxes are now a mainstay for Kist’s three to five year-old students. Each student is provided with their own box and practices self-regulating breathing techniques, \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/58790/why-kindness-and-emotional-literacy-matters-in-raising-kids\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">providing compassion and empathy towards others\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, and labeling and expressing their emotions throughout the school day.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kist, an early childhood educator with 27 years of experience, works at a school that follows the \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://consciousdiscipline.com/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Conscious Discipline\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> framework, which is rooted in social-emotional learning and trauma-informed practices, and \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://teachingstrategies.com/product/the-creative-curriculum-for-preschool/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Creative Curriculum\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a project-based early learning framework. Her school also encourages building a “school family” in order to foster safety and connection among the students, faculty and staff. For Kist, a big part of providing safety and connection in her classroom comes from \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61233/why-cultivating-emotional-intelligence-among-toddlers-has-become-more-urgent\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">helping young learners identify and process their emotions\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, and “little safe place” boxes are a tool for that.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“Being aware of your emotions is the first step in learning how to regulate them,” said \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://parentingtranslator.substack.com/\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Cara Goodwin\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, a child psychologist and author of the \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/tag/parenting-translator\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Parenting Translator newsletter\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. Identifying and \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/62501/want-your-kids-to-be-happier-and-healthier-start-talking-with-them-about-uncomfortable-emotions\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">expressing emotions\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> are “essential for the development of empathy and for maintaining healthy social relationships,” Goodwin continued.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>“Little safe place” boxes\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kist starts the school year by introducing her young students to the four basic emotions: happy, sad, angry and scared. She spends a week on each one, starting with happiness, and uses books, songs, and other classroom visuals as learning aids. Kist continues like this until students are well acquainted with the concepts inside of the “little safe place” boxes. Then she distributes a box to each child.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_63571\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-63571\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-800x1067.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"1067\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-800x1067.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-1020x1360.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-160x213.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-768x1024.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-1152x1536.jpg 1152w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-1536x2048.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace5-scaled.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Jenny Kist created a “My Little Safe Place” box for every student in her early childhood classroom. It contains tools for emotional identification and regulation. \u003ccite>(Courtesy of Jenny Kist)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">After that, each morning Kist guides students through using the different tools in their boxes. They take out a card that has faces for the four basic feelings and mark which feeling they identify with that morning. Then, the children take out their breathing strategy card, which has four different icons that indicate different breathing strategies that they have learned. The boxes also have a card in them that remind the students of what Kist calls “I love you” rituals – nursery rhymes with the lyrics changed and designed to help students with attachment and connection. Students practice an “I love you” ritual one-on-one with a classroom adult each morning.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kist’s “little safe place” boxes are modeled from the self-regulation and emotional identification tools in the “safe place” corner of her classroom, an area that also contains a rug and pillows to comfort students. In a moment of dysregulation, whether the student is using the box or the safe place corner, a classroom adult can guide them to use these tools to recognize and move through their emotions. Each student also has a family photo in their box. “\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/63086/when-family-tree-projects-frustrate-students-community-maps-are-an-inclusive-alternative\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Connections to home\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> are just so helpful if they’re upset about anything,” said Kist.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Learning to identify emotions\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Identifying emotions is a complex process. For young children the first steps in this process are learning to recognize facial expressions, tone of voice and body language, according to Goodwin, the child psychologist. They also need to learn to label those context clues with language.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">According to Goodwin, children should be able to identify emotions by around three or four years old. Although most children will learn how to identify emotions naturally through social interaction, parents and educators can facilitate that learning. “The biggest thing you can do is just talk about emotions,” she said. Taking opportunities to talk about and label your own emotions or the emotions expressed in a children’s TV show or book can be helpful. It is also helpful for parents and educators to label emotions that a child is expressing for them so that “in the future they can then learn to label it themselves,” Goodwin said.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">To help students \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/62290/teaching-kids-the-right-way-to-say-im-sorry\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">build empathy\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, Goodwin recommends parents and educators ask young children what a character in a book or tv show might be feeling, and why they might be feeling that way. One activity that Goodwin has found useful in her personal and professional life is “\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://rainbowdays.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/Rainbow-Days-SEL-Resource-Feelings-Charades-on-website.pdf\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">feeling charades\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">.” In this game, both children and adults act out a feeling, while the other participants guess what feeling they are expressing. Feeling charades can also be played with puppets or toys.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Learning to regulate emotions\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In Kist’s classroom, students practice emotional regulation strategies throughout the day, not just when there’s a peer conflict or an individual child is distressed. “You can’t teach it when they’re in the middle of it,” Kist said. When a child is upset, she takes time to acknowledge the student’s feelings, reflect back to them what their face is expressing and suggest an emotion that they might be feeling. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kist’s students also practice different breathing techniques throughout the day. \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/63039/to-help-students-deal-with-trauma-this-school-holds-mindfulness-lessons-over-the-loudspeaker\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Breathing exercises can be helpful for self-regulation\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, but young children need concrete explanations, so the techniques Kist uses have a symbol, such as a star or a balloon. The visual reminders are printed on a small laminated page in their “little safe place” box. When a student needs to access deep breathing, they can pull out their breathing card and choose an exercise. Kist and her students also make up their own breathing exercises, always involving a physical aspect like deep breathing while swinging their leg to kick an imaginary ball.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_63512\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"max-width: 800px\">\u003cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-63512 size-medium\" src=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-800x600.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"800\" height=\"600\" srcset=\"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-800x600.jpg 800w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-1020x765.jpg 1020w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-160x120.jpg 160w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-768x576.jpg 768w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-1536x1152.jpg 1536w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-2048x1536.jpg 2048w, https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/23/2024/04/safeplace3-1920x1440.jpg 1920w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">The “safe place” corner of Jenny Kist’s classroom contains a rug and pillows to comfort students, as well as tools to help them identify and process their feelings. \u003ccite>(Courtesy of Jenny Kist)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Goodwin suggested encouraging children to breathe in through their nose and out through their mouth by pretending to smell a flower and blow out a candle. This can be given as a verbal explanation, but can also be helped by using fake flowers and candles, or even drawings for children to reference. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Goodwin also uses \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RiMb2Bw4Ae8\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">belly breathing\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, where young children put their hands on their bellies as they breathe to feel how their abdomen expands and contracts with each breath, as well as \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FKdApTxsDP0\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">five-finger breathing\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, where children trace their fingers on one hand with the index finger on their other hand as they take slow breaths, one per finger. Teaching these techniques can be frustrating because kids at this age are easily distracted and learning these skills for the first time. It “just takes like a lot of modeling,” and “a lot of reminding,” said Goodwin.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>COVID-19 origins and ongoing impact\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Kist originally created the “my little safe place” boxes when the early learning center went virtual in spring 2020 because of the COVID-19 pandemic. During the unfamiliar experience of virtual learning, she wanted to find a way to provide a portable and accessible version of the safe space corner for each student.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Initially, not every student was given a “little safe place” box. But as she saw how helpful they were to the students that she had given them to during at home learning, Kist decided that every student in her classroom should have one. Since incorporating the boxes in her in-person classroom, she has seen students bring other students their boxes in moments of dysregulation. She has also seen some of her young learners singing their “I love you” nursery rhymes with each other unprompted.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">According to Goodwin, we don’t yet have enough data to determine if distance learning had \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/61310/are-the-pandemic-babies-and-kids-ok\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">any long-term effects\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> on young children’s ability to identify and process emotions, but she is encouraged by the knowledge that children’s brains are very plastic. There is a sensitive period for developing the skills to process emotions, but that “doesn’t mean that’s the only time you can learn those skills,” Goodwin said. At the same time, she added, it doesn’t hurt for parents and educators to focus on educating young children on emotional and social emotional skills that they may have missed out on during the early years of the pandemic.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/mindshift/63506/young-children-need-help-identifying-emotions-little-safe-place-boxes-give-them-tools","authors":["11759"],"categories":["mindshift_194","mindshift_21280","mindshift_21385","mindshift_193"],"tags":["mindshift_20720","mindshift_21157","mindshift_20699","mindshift_841","mindshift_152","mindshift_943"],"featImg":"mindshift_63511","label":"mindshift"},"mindshift_60025":{"type":"posts","id":"mindshift_60025","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"mindshift","id":"60025","score":null,"sort":[1665669529000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"how-to-change-your-kids-behavior-according-to-the-host-of-a-hit-parenting-podcast","title":"How to change your kid's behavior, according to the host of a hit parenting podcast","publishDate":1665669529,"format":"standard","headTitle":"MindShift | KQED News","labelTerm":{"site":"mindshift"},"content":"\u003cdiv class=\"storyMajorUpdateDate\">\u003cstrong>Updated October 12, 2022 at 9:08 AM ET\u003c/strong>\u003c/div>\n\u003cp>This is a typical morning with my three kids, all under age 10. The youngest one wants help putting on her shoes. The oldest is whining about how she has \"nothing\" to wear. And the middle daughter is growing increasingly anxious that we are \"GOING TO BE LATE!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>My initial reaction in this scenario — before they start smacking each other — is to sanction my kids. I might threaten to take away their screen time or make them sit alone in their rooms.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But clinical psychologist Becky Kennedy, author of the new book \u003ca href=\"https://www.amazon.com/Good-Inside-Guide-Becoming-Parent/dp/0063159481/ref=sr_1_1?gclid=CjwKCAjwvsqZBhAlEiwAqAHElcGj29T7YeG2z6W_eUa6uKb0CnHg50JBiiMgaAPkrUBOFYroBorCdhoCYGQQAvD_BwE&hvadid=598731412760&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9013187&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=b&hvrand=702880839577198777&hvtargid=kwd-1532735926777&hydadcr=14931_13423601&keywords=dr+becky+good+inside&qid=1664290913&qu=eyJxc2MiOiIxLjYyIiwicXNhIjoiMS4wOCIsInFzcCI6IjAuODkifQ%3D%3D&sr=8-1\">\u003cem>Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, says parents should try another approach. Rather than using timeouts and consequences to change a child's behavior, parents should make an effort to understand \u003cem>why\u003c/em> their kid is acting out in the first place.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To do that, says Kennedy, parents have to assume their child is inherently \"good inside\" – that they have good intentions and want to do the right thing. This mindset can help parents avoid making assumptions about their child's character — and focus their attention instead on unpacking the root reasons of the behavior. Doing so, she says, creates an opportunity for parents to show validation and empathy to their child and encourage their personal growth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kennedy, a mother of three based in New York City and host of the \u003ca href=\"https://www.goodinside.com/podcast/\">hit parenting podcast and online community Good Inside\u003c/a>, talks to Life Kit about strategies for common behavioral issues in young children. This conversation has been edited for length and clarity. Additional context has been added to the questions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 1100px\">\u003cimg src=\"https://media.npr.org/assets/img/2022/09/21/lk_drbeckyportrait_goodinsidebookcover_custom-7d4f625f672714e077892b3a6c084402d45abf55-s1100-c50.jpg\" alt=\"Photo of author Becky Kennedy and book jacket\" width=\"1100\" height=\"816\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Becky Kennedy is a clinical psychologist, the host of the podcast Good Inside with Dr. Becky and the author of Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be. (Left: Photograph by Melanie Dunea; Right: Harper Wave)\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>How does the \"good inside\" mentality help when a kid is, say, acting out? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let's say my three-year-old son just hit his sister. That is not at all good behavior. But if I base my mindset on the idea that my kid is \"good inside,\" then I can activate curiosity. \u003cem>Why\u003c/em> is my kid hitting his sister?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When I don't operate from that foundation, it's easy to put frustration, anger and judgment in the driver's seat and think, \"What is wrong with my kid? Do I have kids who are never going to get along?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The idea of \"good inside\" [helps parents] see the identity of our kid as separate from a descriptor of a behavior.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>So let's walk through how you would deal with your son in this situation. Your first step, you say, is to address the hitting. \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Right. So I might say [to my son], \"I'm not going to let you hit your sister.\" Then I'd look at my daughter and say, \"Ouch, I know that hurt. That wasn't OK.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>And instead of disciplining the kid who's hitting, which is what \u003c/strong>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>my\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> instinct would be as a parent, your approach is to actually \u003c/strong>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>connect\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> with that child. To you, that means making an effort to understand what's going on and help them feel confident, capable and worthy. What does that look like in the real world? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So let's stay with the hitting example. A \"connection-first\" experience [from a parent would be like]: whoa, it's clearly not OK to hit and also I have a good kid. He's struggling. I should connect to him. [To do that], I'm going to look at my son and say, \"You're having a hard time. I'm here. We're going to figure it out together.\" I am \u003cem>connecting\u003c/em> to the kid having a hard time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>I'm not hearing any consequences to your son for hitting his sister. Some parents might take issue with that — for many, disciplining is a way to show kids that what they're doing is wrong. Why do you prefer connection over behavior correction, as you say in your book? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[Chastising a child when they exhibit bad behavior] only increases their shame and belief inside of, \"See? This part of me is so bad and so unlovable.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What happens if a parent chooses the discipline route and yells at their child for hitting? How can they repair the connection with their kid? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The key elements to a repair — or some version of saying you're sorry — is sharing your reflections with your kid about what happened, then saying what you wish you had done differently.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Something like, \"Hey, last week something happened and maybe you're not remembering it, but I'm remembering it and I want to bring it up again. I yelled at you big time. I was having a lot going on at work and I was having big feelings that came out in a yelling voice. And just like we talk about you learning to manage feelings, well, guess what? I'm still learning that too. It's never your fault when I yell. I love you.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/transcripts/1124314881\">\u003cem>Listen to the full interview\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem> with Becky Kennedy on Life Kit. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>The audio portion of this episode was produced by Sylvie Douglis. The digital story was edited by Malaka Gharib. We'd love to hear from you. Leave us a voicemail at \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"tel:2022169823\">\u003cem>202-216-9823\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>, or email us at \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"mailto:LifeKit@npr.org\">\u003cem>LifeKit@npr.org\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">Copyright 2022 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=How+to+change+your+kid%27s+behavior%2C+according+to+the+host+of+a+hit+parenting+podcast&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/div>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"It all starts with the assumption that your kids have good intentions and want to do the right thing, says Becky Kennedy, a psychologist and host of the Good Inside parenting podcast. ","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1666361147,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":22,"wordCount":930},"headData":{"title":"How to change your kid's behavior, according to the host of a hit parenting podcast - MindShift","description":"It all starts with the assumption that your kids have good intentions and want to do the right thing, says Becky Kennedy, a psychologist and host of the Good Inside parenting podcast. ","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"60025 https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/?p=60025","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/2022/10/13/how-to-change-your-kids-behavior-according-to-the-host-of-a-hit-parenting-podcast/","disqusTitle":"How to change your kid's behavior, according to the host of a hit parenting podcast","nprByline":"Elise Hu and Sylvie Douglis","nprImageAgency":"Tilda Rose for NPR ","nprStoryId":"1124314881","nprApiLink":"http://api.npr.org/query?id=1124314881&profileTypeId=15&apiKey=MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004","nprHtmlLink":"https://www.npr.org/2022/09/21/1124314881/why-you-should-connect-with-your-kid-not-correct-them?ft=nprml&f=1124314881","nprRetrievedStory":"1","nprPubDate":"Fri, 14 Oct 2022 11:24:00 -0400","nprStoryDate":"Mon, 26 Sep 2022 03:00:10 -0400","nprLastModifiedDate":"Fri, 14 Oct 2022 11:24:41 -0400","nprAudio":"https://ondemand.npr.org/anon.npr-mp3/npr/lifekit/2022/09/20220926_lifekit_9a93b5f6-c6e1-4a0b-875d-f558bc86d054.mp3?orgId=1&topicId=1033&aggIds=676529561&d=1107&p=510338&story=1124314881&t=podcast&e=1124314881&ft=nprml&f=1124314881,https://ondemand.npr.org/anon.npr-mp3/npr/lifekit/2022/09/20220926_lifekit_abf2823d-e96b-4357-93e9-47f35ba44e14_noad.mp3?orgId=1&topicId=1033&aggIds=676529561&d=1106&p=510338&story=1124314881&t=podcast&e=1124314881&ft=nprml&f=1124314881","nprAudioM3u":"http://api.npr.org/m3u/11124820908-a11222.m3u?orgId=1&topicId=1033&aggIds=676529561&d=1107&p=510338&story=1124314881&t=podcast&e=1124314881&ft=nprml&f=1124314881,http://api.npr.org/m3u/11124855786-a4a2c2.m3u?orgId=1&topicId=1033&aggIds=676529561&d=1106&p=510338&story=1124314881&t=podcast&e=1124314881&ft=nprml&f=1124314881","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","showOnAuthorArchivePages":"No","path":"/mindshift/60025/how-to-change-your-kids-behavior-according-to-the-host-of-a-hit-parenting-podcast","audioUrl":"https://ondemand.npr.org/anon.npr-mp3/npr/lifekit/2022/09/20220926_lifekit_9a93b5f6-c6e1-4a0b-875d-f558bc86d054.mp3?orgId=1&topicId=1033&aggIds=676529561&d=1107&p=510338&story=1124314881&t=podcast&e=1124314881&ft=nprml&f=1124314881,https://ondemand.npr.org/anon.npr-mp3/npr/lifekit/2022/09/20220926_lifekit_abf2823d-e96b-4357-93e9-47f35ba44e14_noad.mp3?orgId=1&topicId=1033&aggIds=676529561&d=1106&p=510338&story=1124314881&t=podcast&e=1124314881&ft=nprml&f=1124314881","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cdiv class=\"storyMajorUpdateDate\">\u003cstrong>Updated October 12, 2022 at 9:08 AM ET\u003c/strong>\u003c/div>\n\u003cp>This is a typical morning with my three kids, all under age 10. The youngest one wants help putting on her shoes. The oldest is whining about how she has \"nothing\" to wear. And the middle daughter is growing increasingly anxious that we are \"GOING TO BE LATE!\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>My initial reaction in this scenario — before they start smacking each other — is to sanction my kids. I might threaten to take away their screen time or make them sit alone in their rooms.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But clinical psychologist Becky Kennedy, author of the new book \u003ca href=\"https://www.amazon.com/Good-Inside-Guide-Becoming-Parent/dp/0063159481/ref=sr_1_1?gclid=CjwKCAjwvsqZBhAlEiwAqAHElcGj29T7YeG2z6W_eUa6uKb0CnHg50JBiiMgaAPkrUBOFYroBorCdhoCYGQQAvD_BwE&hvadid=598731412760&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9013187&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=b&hvrand=702880839577198777&hvtargid=kwd-1532735926777&hydadcr=14931_13423601&keywords=dr+becky+good+inside&qid=1664290913&qu=eyJxc2MiOiIxLjYyIiwicXNhIjoiMS4wOCIsInFzcCI6IjAuODkifQ%3D%3D&sr=8-1\">\u003cem>Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be\u003c/em>\u003c/a>, says parents should try another approach. Rather than using timeouts and consequences to change a child's behavior, parents should make an effort to understand \u003cem>why\u003c/em> their kid is acting out in the first place.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>To do that, says Kennedy, parents have to assume their child is inherently \"good inside\" – that they have good intentions and want to do the right thing. This mindset can help parents avoid making assumptions about their child's character — and focus their attention instead on unpacking the root reasons of the behavior. Doing so, she says, creates an opportunity for parents to show validation and empathy to their child and encourage their personal growth.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kennedy, a mother of three based in New York City and host of the \u003ca href=\"https://www.goodinside.com/podcast/\">hit parenting podcast and online community Good Inside\u003c/a>, talks to Life Kit about strategies for common behavioral issues in young children. This conversation has been edited for length and clarity. Additional context has been added to the questions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 1100px\">\u003cimg src=\"https://media.npr.org/assets/img/2022/09/21/lk_drbeckyportrait_goodinsidebookcover_custom-7d4f625f672714e077892b3a6c084402d45abf55-s1100-c50.jpg\" alt=\"Photo of author Becky Kennedy and book jacket\" width=\"1100\" height=\"816\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Becky Kennedy is a clinical psychologist, the host of the podcast Good Inside with Dr. Becky and the author of Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be. (Left: Photograph by Melanie Dunea; Right: Harper Wave)\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>How does the \"good inside\" mentality help when a kid is, say, acting out? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Let's say my three-year-old son just hit his sister. That is not at all good behavior. But if I base my mindset on the idea that my kid is \"good inside,\" then I can activate curiosity. \u003cem>Why\u003c/em> is my kid hitting his sister?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When I don't operate from that foundation, it's easy to put frustration, anger and judgment in the driver's seat and think, \"What is wrong with my kid? Do I have kids who are never going to get along?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The idea of \"good inside\" [helps parents] see the identity of our kid as separate from a descriptor of a behavior.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>So let's walk through how you would deal with your son in this situation. Your first step, you say, is to address the hitting. \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Right. So I might say [to my son], \"I'm not going to let you hit your sister.\" Then I'd look at my daughter and say, \"Ouch, I know that hurt. That wasn't OK.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>And instead of disciplining the kid who's hitting, which is what \u003c/strong>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>my\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> instinct would be as a parent, your approach is to actually \u003c/strong>\u003cem>\u003cstrong>connect\u003c/strong>\u003c/em>\u003cstrong> with that child. To you, that means making an effort to understand what's going on and help them feel confident, capable and worthy. What does that look like in the real world? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So let's stay with the hitting example. A \"connection-first\" experience [from a parent would be like]: whoa, it's clearly not OK to hit and also I have a good kid. He's struggling. I should connect to him. [To do that], I'm going to look at my son and say, \"You're having a hard time. I'm here. We're going to figure it out together.\" I am \u003cem>connecting\u003c/em> to the kid having a hard time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>I'm not hearing any consequences to your son for hitting his sister. Some parents might take issue with that — for many, disciplining is a way to show kids that what they're doing is wrong. Why do you prefer connection over behavior correction, as you say in your book? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[Chastising a child when they exhibit bad behavior] only increases their shame and belief inside of, \"See? This part of me is so bad and so unlovable.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>What happens if a parent chooses the discipline route and yells at their child for hitting? How can they repair the connection with their kid? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The key elements to a repair — or some version of saying you're sorry — is sharing your reflections with your kid about what happened, then saying what you wish you had done differently.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Something like, \"Hey, last week something happened and maybe you're not remembering it, but I'm remembering it and I want to bring it up again. I yelled at you big time. I was having a lot going on at work and I was having big feelings that came out in a yelling voice. And just like we talk about you learning to manage feelings, well, guess what? I'm still learning that too. It's never your fault when I yell. I love you.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/transcripts/1124314881\">\u003cem>Listen to the full interview\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem> with Becky Kennedy on Life Kit. \u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>The audio portion of this episode was produced by Sylvie Douglis. The digital story was edited by Malaka Gharib. We'd love to hear from you. Leave us a voicemail at \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"tel:2022169823\">\u003cem>202-216-9823\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>, or email us at \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"mailto:LifeKit@npr.org\">\u003cem>LifeKit@npr.org\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">Copyright 2022 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=How+to+change+your+kid%27s+behavior%2C+according+to+the+host+of+a+hit+parenting+podcast&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/mindshift/60025/how-to-change-your-kids-behavior-according-to-the-host-of-a-hit-parenting-podcast","authors":["byline_mindshift_60025"],"categories":["mindshift_21385"],"tags":["mindshift_20699","mindshift_20568"],"featImg":"mindshift_60026","label":"mindshift"},"mindshift_59748":{"type":"posts","id":"mindshift_59748","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"mindshift","id":"59748","score":null,"sort":[1661240165000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"how-perspective-taking-can-improve-classroom-behavior-and-teacher-student-relationships","title":"How perspective taking can improve classroom behavior and teacher-student relationships","publishDate":1661240165,"format":"standard","headTitle":"MindShift | KQED News","labelTerm":{"site":"mindshift"},"content":"\u003cp>One of the most vexing dilemmas for teachers is finding the best way to respond to students who misbehave. Experts argue over whether the best classroom-management approach is a consistent, strict discipline or a more forgiving response where students discuss their grievances with an adult’s guidance, a process called restorative justice. For-profit software companies sell systems to encourage teachers to award points or stars for good behavior and deduct them for misbehavior, but critics complain that the constant monitoring can feel too controlling and public shaming can be discouraging. Who can blame new teachers for feeling confused and ill-prepared to manage classroom disruptions?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Education researchers have been studying ways to prevent behavior problems from erupting in the first place, much like the field of preventive medicine aims to help people live healthier lives to minimize incidence of heart disease, cancer and diabetes. Generously doling out \u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proof-points-putting-praise-to-the-test/\">praise\u003c/a> has proved to be somewhat effective in previous studies. In this column, I’m going to explain an idea that steals a page from marriage counseling: perspective taking. Its advocates advise teachers to put themselves in the shoes of their most perplexing, misbehaving students and simply imagine what they are thinking and feeling.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It might seem far-fetched that a simple, imaginative exercise inside the mind of the person who isn’t misbehaving – the teacher – would make any difference to the classroom atmosphere. But Johns Hopkins education professor Hunter Gehlbach found that students of teachers who were briefly trained in this thought experiment reported better relationships with their teachers and earned higher grades.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We know, unequivocally, one of the best things that anyone can do for classroom management and for teachers to be effective at their jobs across a whole array of outcomes, is to improve teacher-student relationships,” said Gehlbach.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>His theory, and hope, is that students’ need or desire to misbehave might be reduced if they feel a positive connection with the teacher at the front of the classroom.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Gehlbach, together with two other researchers, put perspective taking to a real world test at a charter school network in the northeastern United States. About 50 teachers, in kindergarten through ninth grade, were randomly selected to receive a single, 90-minute workshop. Another 50 teachers would eventually also go through the same training, but the staggered timing allowed the researchers to study what happened in the classrooms of the teachers who received the training first compared to classrooms of teachers who were waiting for it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The session resembled a theater workshop. Teachers sat in pairs and were instructed to begin by thinking about their most frustrating student, with whom they often had conflicts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There’s some child who’s on your roster, who is only one child, but takes up like 70, 80, 90 percent of your emotional bandwidth,” said Gehlbach, a former high school history teacher.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Certain students jumped to the front of the brain of more than one teacher; several teachers had the same exact perplexing student in mind.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Teachers were then told to think of a particularly puzzling behavior or an incident with the student and tell her workshop partner about it. “We invite them to really let loose, say all the things that are frustrating and maddening about the child,” said Gehlbach.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then, the teacher was asked to retell the story from the child’s perspective. If I were a teacher in this workshop, playing the role of the student, I might say, “Man, Ms. Barshay always picks on me. I think it’s because she doesn’t like me. Like, clearly, she’s out to get me. And I think she even got the other teacher down the hall to pick on me too, because she’s just that mean.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“It doesn’t work for every single teacher,” Gehlbach said, “but the juxtaposition of the two perspectives gets a lot of them to internalize, ‘Oh, right. This is more of a two-way street. And I’ve gotten sort of sucked into my own perspective, a little too much.’”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>With the partner’s help, the two teachers brainstorm reasons for why the student might have acted this way. Maybe the parents put too much pressure on the kid. Maybe the parents are going through a divorce.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We don’t come to any sure conclusions,” said Gehlbach. “The final step is to go forth and get more information.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A couple of months later, teachers who had taken the workshop reported more positive relationships with their students than teachers who hadn’t taken it. Students in their classrooms, similarly, reported more positive relationships with their teachers. Most importantly, students’ grades improved, a possible sign that improved teacher-student relationships were translating into more motivated students who wanted to learn and work more. However, while grades improved, math and reading test scores did not.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another big disappointment was that the number of disciplinary incidents were no different among middle school students whose teachers had been trained compared with those who hadn’t; improved teacher-student relationships don’t necessarily translate into better student behavior. (The researchers only had discipline records for middle school students so they weren’t able to perform the same analysis for younger kids.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The paper, “\u003ca href=\"https://edarxiv.org/yvcdb/\">Social Perspective Taking: A Professional Development Induction to Improve Teacher-Student Relationships and Student Learning\u003c/a>,” has been peer-reviewed and is slated for publication in the Journal of Educational Psychology this summer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“It’s not bullet proof,” said Gehlbach. “But we have some evidence that they’re probably learning more from this teacher as a result of this intervention.” Gehlbach calls his classroom experiment a “proof of concept” and hopes to see if it can be repeated in other classrooms around the country\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A 90-minute session on understanding someone else’s perspective will never be a complete answer to student discipline. And, more broadly, all of these preventive discipline ideas are not a substitute for the need to react to student disruptions in the moment. But it’s an interesting theory that appears to do no harm, and this thought experiment might be a helpful addition to the teacher’s toolbox.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This story about\u003c/em> \u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proof-points-borrowing-a-page-from-marriage-therapy-in-the-classroom/\">\u003cem>classroom management\u003c/em>\u003c/a> \u003cem>was written by Jill Barshay and produced by The Hechinger Report, a nonprofit, independent news organization focused on inequality and innovation in education. Sign up for the \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://hechingerreport.us2.list-manage1.com/subscribe?u=66c306eebb323868c3ce353c1&id=d3ee4c3e04\">\u003cem>Hechinger newsletter.\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"A classroom management experiment in perspective taking could help improve teachers’ relationships with disruptive students.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1661240165,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":22,"wordCount":1119},"headData":{"title":"How perspective taking can improve classroom behavior and teacher-student relationships - MindShift","description":"A classroom management experiment in perspective taking could help improve teachers’ relationships with disruptive students.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"59748 https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/?p=59748","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/2022/08/23/how-perspective-taking-can-improve-classroom-behavior-and-teacher-student-relationships/","disqusTitle":"How perspective taking can improve classroom behavior and teacher-student relationships","nprByline":"Jill Barshay, \u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/\">The Hechinger Report\u003c/a>","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","showOnAuthorArchivePages":"No","path":"/mindshift/59748/how-perspective-taking-can-improve-classroom-behavior-and-teacher-student-relationships","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>One of the most vexing dilemmas for teachers is finding the best way to respond to students who misbehave. Experts argue over whether the best classroom-management approach is a consistent, strict discipline or a more forgiving response where students discuss their grievances with an adult’s guidance, a process called restorative justice. For-profit software companies sell systems to encourage teachers to award points or stars for good behavior and deduct them for misbehavior, but critics complain that the constant monitoring can feel too controlling and public shaming can be discouraging. Who can blame new teachers for feeling confused and ill-prepared to manage classroom disruptions?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Education researchers have been studying ways to prevent behavior problems from erupting in the first place, much like the field of preventive medicine aims to help people live healthier lives to minimize incidence of heart disease, cancer and diabetes. Generously doling out \u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proof-points-putting-praise-to-the-test/\">praise\u003c/a> has proved to be somewhat effective in previous studies. In this column, I’m going to explain an idea that steals a page from marriage counseling: perspective taking. Its advocates advise teachers to put themselves in the shoes of their most perplexing, misbehaving students and simply imagine what they are thinking and feeling.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It might seem far-fetched that a simple, imaginative exercise inside the mind of the person who isn’t misbehaving – the teacher – would make any difference to the classroom atmosphere. But Johns Hopkins education professor Hunter Gehlbach found that students of teachers who were briefly trained in this thought experiment reported better relationships with their teachers and earned higher grades.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We know, unequivocally, one of the best things that anyone can do for classroom management and for teachers to be effective at their jobs across a whole array of outcomes, is to improve teacher-student relationships,” said Gehlbach.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>His theory, and hope, is that students’ need or desire to misbehave might be reduced if they feel a positive connection with the teacher at the front of the classroom.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Gehlbach, together with two other researchers, put perspective taking to a real world test at a charter school network in the northeastern United States. About 50 teachers, in kindergarten through ninth grade, were randomly selected to receive a single, 90-minute workshop. Another 50 teachers would eventually also go through the same training, but the staggered timing allowed the researchers to study what happened in the classrooms of the teachers who received the training first compared to classrooms of teachers who were waiting for it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The session resembled a theater workshop. Teachers sat in pairs and were instructed to begin by thinking about their most frustrating student, with whom they often had conflicts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“There’s some child who’s on your roster, who is only one child, but takes up like 70, 80, 90 percent of your emotional bandwidth,” said Gehlbach, a former high school history teacher.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Certain students jumped to the front of the brain of more than one teacher; several teachers had the same exact perplexing student in mind.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Teachers were then told to think of a particularly puzzling behavior or an incident with the student and tell her workshop partner about it. “We invite them to really let loose, say all the things that are frustrating and maddening about the child,” said Gehlbach.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then, the teacher was asked to retell the story from the child’s perspective. If I were a teacher in this workshop, playing the role of the student, I might say, “Man, Ms. Barshay always picks on me. I think it’s because she doesn’t like me. Like, clearly, she’s out to get me. And I think she even got the other teacher down the hall to pick on me too, because she’s just that mean.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“It doesn’t work for every single teacher,” Gehlbach said, “but the juxtaposition of the two perspectives gets a lot of them to internalize, ‘Oh, right. This is more of a two-way street. And I’ve gotten sort of sucked into my own perspective, a little too much.’”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>With the partner’s help, the two teachers brainstorm reasons for why the student might have acted this way. Maybe the parents put too much pressure on the kid. Maybe the parents are going through a divorce.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We don’t come to any sure conclusions,” said Gehlbach. “The final step is to go forth and get more information.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A couple of months later, teachers who had taken the workshop reported more positive relationships with their students than teachers who hadn’t taken it. Students in their classrooms, similarly, reported more positive relationships with their teachers. Most importantly, students’ grades improved, a possible sign that improved teacher-student relationships were translating into more motivated students who wanted to learn and work more. However, while grades improved, math and reading test scores did not.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Another big disappointment was that the number of disciplinary incidents were no different among middle school students whose teachers had been trained compared with those who hadn’t; improved teacher-student relationships don’t necessarily translate into better student behavior. (The researchers only had discipline records for middle school students so they weren’t able to perform the same analysis for younger kids.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The paper, “\u003ca href=\"https://edarxiv.org/yvcdb/\">Social Perspective Taking: A Professional Development Induction to Improve Teacher-Student Relationships and Student Learning\u003c/a>,” has been peer-reviewed and is slated for publication in the Journal of Educational Psychology this summer.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“It’s not bullet proof,” said Gehlbach. “But we have some evidence that they’re probably learning more from this teacher as a result of this intervention.” Gehlbach calls his classroom experiment a “proof of concept” and hopes to see if it can be repeated in other classrooms around the country\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A 90-minute session on understanding someone else’s perspective will never be a complete answer to student discipline. And, more broadly, all of these preventive discipline ideas are not a substitute for the need to react to student disruptions in the moment. But it’s an interesting theory that appears to do no harm, and this thought experiment might be a helpful addition to the teacher’s toolbox.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>This story about\u003c/em> \u003ca href=\"https://hechingerreport.org/proof-points-borrowing-a-page-from-marriage-therapy-in-the-classroom/\">\u003cem>classroom management\u003c/em>\u003c/a> \u003cem>was written by Jill Barshay and produced by The Hechinger Report, a nonprofit, independent news organization focused on inequality and innovation in education. Sign up for the \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"http://hechingerreport.us2.list-manage1.com/subscribe?u=66c306eebb323868c3ce353c1&id=d3ee4c3e04\">\u003cem>Hechinger newsletter.\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/mindshift/59748/how-perspective-taking-can-improve-classroom-behavior-and-teacher-student-relationships","authors":["byline_mindshift_59748"],"categories":["mindshift_193"],"tags":["mindshift_21198","mindshift_21474","mindshift_698","mindshift_20699","mindshift_20865","mindshift_21022","mindshift_21213","mindshift_943"],"featImg":"mindshift_59751","label":"mindshift"},"mindshift_58638":{"type":"posts","id":"mindshift_58638","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"mindshift","id":"58638","score":null,"sort":[1635227031000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"listening-to-learn-why-ear-hustle-stories-about-prison-life-is-so-engaging-to-students","title":"Listening to learn: Why ‘Ear Hustle’ stories about prison life are so engaging to students","publishDate":1635227031,"format":"standard","headTitle":"MindShift | KQED News","labelTerm":{"site":"mindshift"},"content":"\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">When the podcast Ear Hustle first launched in 2017, Nigel Poor and Earlonne Woods explored the largely invisible stories inside San Quentin State Prison. While the word “prison” might make one think of felonies, violence and hardened criminals, any listener could clearly hear that the heart of the podcast is about humanity, early life choices and confronting mistakes. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">For example, \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2017/6/14/cellies\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">their first episode “Cellies”\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> is about seeking a person to safely share one's limited space. Other episodes cover topics like parents working through challenging conditions to be \u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2018/4/25/thick-glass\">present in their children's lives\u003c/a> and\u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> nurturers who care for \u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2017/7/12/looking-out\">unusual pets in a medium security facility\u003c/a>\u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Podcast fans also got to hear incarcerated people reflect on what their lives were like growing up long before they ended up in San Quentin, including stories about their relationships with family and community members. Listeners, including teachers, heard this connection and reached out to Ear Hustle’s creators to share. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“We got a lot of letters from teachers and their students talking about what they learned from the episode,” said Woods. He met Poor, a visual artist and educator, while serving a 31-years-to-life sentence at San Quentin. He served \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2018/11/22/670313799/earlonne-woods-co-host-of-ear-hustle-podcast-gets-prison-sentence-commuted\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">21 years before having his sentence commuted\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> by the governor in 2018. Educators were drawn to using Ear Hustle episodes as springboards for multimodal activities in their classrooms. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">And now there is\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://sites.prh.com/thisisearhustle\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> “This is Ear Hustle: Unflinching Stories of Everyday Prison Life,”\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> their new book about uncovering and amplifying stories about prison life and how they came together to co-host the first ever podcast produced within a prison. They also write about their experiences in school, how it shaped their lives and how it informs what they do today. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“I was one of [those] kids that learned to read way later,” said Woods. “I was the class clown to avoid being in the situations of reading, being in the situations of math, so I would just act out.” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Similarly, Poor writes about how she had dyslexia and undiagnosed learning disabilities that made school difficult even though she was naturally curious. “I've carried that with me. That idea of being told that I wasn't smart, that I couldn't do things, that I was bothersome because teachers had to explain things to me over and over again,” she said. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">With a podcast that is already rich with activities for young learners, “This is Ear Hustle” provides more accounts from incarcerated and formerly incarcerated people that students can explore in the classroom.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>How podcasts build writing skills\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Benjamin Bush, a Kentucky-based high school English teacher, started using Ear Hustle in his class because he was looking for a new way to engage his students. “The biggest problem that I think that it addresses is apathy. Getting someone to just start working on something is the hardest,” said Bush. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Ear Hustle drew in his learners because it allowed them to listen to voices other than his. They could hear from a wide range of people featured on the podcast and relate to their experiences. “We got to know the backgrounds of their lives and the things that they had struggled with through poverty and trauma, which affects a lot of our kids,” he said. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">After each episode, Bush’s students did a related writing assignment. “It allowed me to reimagine what a text is in a classroom and how multimedia exists in a classroom in the same way that a novel or a play would.” For example,\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2017/6/14/cellies\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> “Cellies”\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> examines the size of a typical prison cell (Woods’ was five feet by ten feet at San Quentin) and how to negotiate the space with a cellmate. “We all have roommates at some point in our lives,” writes Woods in his book. “We also wanted the subject to be something that everybody could relate to—whether they were in prison or in society.” In class, Bush and his students used rulers to measure out the size of a cell and did creative writing about what it would feel like to inhabit the limited space with another person. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">For another assignment, Bush brought in additional articles about solitary confinement, sentencing guidelines and parole rules for students to fuel their classroom conversations about prison systems. Later, students could choose to write a persuasive argument piece about one of the issues they talked about. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">After listening to\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2017/8/09/catch-a-kite\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> “Catch a Kite,”\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> an episode about receiving letters, students had the opportunity to write a letter to someone in the podcast. In one letter, a student talks about how he identifies with how his letter recipient needed to commit crimes to support his family. Another student wrote about how \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2018/4/25/thick-glass\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“Thick Glass,” Ear Hustle’s episode about parenting\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, helped her understand dynamics within her own family. “Her father had been in and out of prison,” Bush said. “She wrote in her letter that Ear Hustle allowed her to envision her father as a good father. She was able to see him as redeemable in a way that maybe she hadn't before.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n\u003cp lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">Little Jaylen's beautiful letter. Hear his letter at the end of our most recent episode \"Thick Glass\": \u003ca href=\"https://t.co/uecEBskphM\">https://t.co/uecEBskphM\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"https://t.co/IZVr1rPSS7\">pic.twitter.com/IZVr1rPSS7\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>— Ear Hustle Podcast (@earhustlesq) \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/earhustlesq/status/991359292174413824?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">May 1, 2018\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>\u003cscript async src=\"https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\">\u003c/script>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Connection and a sense of not being alone in hard situations are key feelings that Woods hopes to leave with young people who listen to Ear Hustle’s stories. \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">He also thinks these connections help young people become better learners.\u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> “You can benefit from someone's story,” he said. “You can have a different insight on something that will help you navigate through your life.” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Kinetic learning and listening\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Ear Hustle co-host Nigel Poor has brought the podcast into her photography classes at California State University, Sacramento, saying its focus on storytelling primes students to slow down and build important skills in observing. “I use it to talk about storytelling and compassionate listening and building empathy, which I think are tools anybody needs no matter what they're studying.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=By0d5G4yRzM\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">For her class, Ear Hustle is the basis of a kinetic learning experience to help students pay attention to other invisible stories. She’ll tell students to go for a walk outside and find something discarded on the ground that draws their attention. Picking up abandoned bits and pieces is part of Poor’s art practice, and when she first started volunteering at San Quentin, she would collect things from the prison’s parking lot. In the book, she describes the lot as her “hunting ground.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In class, she’ll invite students to bring back their found object and share a story they’ve created about it. “It sounds weird at first, but it gets people to connect with their creativity and the associations that they make with objects and experiences. And that's, to me, where stories start.” She’ll then move into playing clips from Ear Hustle and discussing what people hear in them and how she and Earlonne put episodes together.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“There's so much [emphasis] put on the end result,” said Poor about education. “Listening and thinking is actually a valid activity. So I like to talk about that, and I like to talk about ways to pull stories out of people and give people the confidence to talk about themselves.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Using hands-on learning to understand systems\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Danielle Devencenzi, assistant principal at St. Ignatius College Prep high school in San Francisco, begins her criminal justice class by looking at major legislation that shaped the U.S. justice system such as California's Three Strikes Sentencing Law, the 1994 Crime Bill and landmark US Supreme Court cases. “Twelve years ago, I started to take my students to San Quentin to really understand the social justice issues facing our prison system in California, specifically mass incarceration,” she said.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://twitter.com/MsDevencenzi/status/961419775250350080\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Hearing firsthand from incarcerated people and seeing the environment adds more depth to the books and articles they discuss as part of the class, according to Devencenzi. “I'm a firm believer that if you don't really see what's happening and really talk to the people who are impacted by our systems, then you can't really be an informed agent of change.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Devencenzi gives each of her students a notebook that they’ll use to write down their reactions, observations and notes from conversations with the people they meet on their tour of the prison. In a debrief, after visiting the prison, Devencenzi has students circle up their desks to share one thing from their notebook while she takes notes that she’ll later send to San Quentin. “They always talk about the humanity of the guys and how brave they are to tell their story in front of a bunch of complete strangers,” she said. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">When Ear Hustle first came out, her class was able to see the recording studio and meet some of the people featured in the episodes during their visits to San Quentin. “The podcast just became humanized when they met Curtis,” said Devencenzi about connecting with Curtis Roberts, who shared his story in “\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2017/9/27/left-behind\">Left Behind\u003c/a>.” Like Woods, Roberts had his sentence commuted in 2018. “It was just a month later when Curtis actually came to my classroom and visited my students again after they had met him in the prison yard,\" said Devencenzi. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n\u003cp lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">Curtis Roberts who served a 29 year prison sentence comes to \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/StIgnatius?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">@StIgnatius\u003c/a> to speak with criminal justice students who just visited San Quentin. Check out his \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/earhustlesq?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">@earhustlesq\u003c/a> episode called Left Behind \u003ca href=\"https://t.co/MkNenCgs0Z\">pic.twitter.com/MkNenCgs0Z\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>— Danielle Devencenzi (@MsDevencenzi) \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/MsDevencenzi/status/1201586814026428418?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">December 2, 2019\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>\u003cscript async src=\"https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\">\u003c/script>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">As a culminating project, students in Devencenzi’s criminal justice class create a podcast based on in-depth interviews. Students explore their communities looking for trends and topics that – like their favorite episodes of Ear Hustle – require a little digging to uncover. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Woods and Poor have dreams of creating an entire Ear Hustle curriculum that includes the expanded stories and deeper dives from “This is Ear Hustle.” At Woods’ request, Poor stands up to show that she’s wearing a black one-piece jumpsuit as part of her work for an episode \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/challenge\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">about a 30-day Ear Hustle challenge. \u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“We're asking listeners to come on this journey with us where we are eating the food that's eaten in prison during the same time and wearing three select outfits,” said Poor. “Not because we think we can replicate life in prison, but as a way to just build awareness and empathy about some of the things you give up when you go to prison.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">They think the Ear Hustle challenge, which draws on themes surfaced in the “Prison 101” chapter from “This is Ear Hustle” and an episode from season two called “The Workaround,” would be a worthwhile activity for high school students.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">While stories from behind prison walls may seem to be an unlikely place to find education materials, Ear Hustle shows that there are several entry points into learning where storytelling is concerned. “There's learning through reading. There's learning through experiencing. People who don't necessarily think they're educators actually can be educators,” said Poor. “I would love for that to be a lesson of 'This is Ear Hustle': that voices really matter and that there's surprising stories everywhere that are worthy of being heard.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>MindShift is part of KQED, a non-profit NPR and PBS member station in San Francisco, CA. The text of this specific article is available to republish for noncommercial purposes under a Creative Commons \u003ca href=\"https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/\">CC BY-NC-ND 4.0\u003c/a> license, thanks to support from the William and Flora Hewlett Foundation.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Many rich multimodal learning activities have come from using Ear Hustle, a podcast created by Earlonne Woods and Nigel Poor, in the classroom. Now, teachers can use their new book This is Ear Hustle to further unlock the power of storytelling.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1664479644,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":true,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":33,"wordCount":2075},"headData":{"title":"Listening to learn: Why ‘Ear Hustle’ stories about prison life are so engaging to students - MindShift","description":"Many rich multimodal learning activities have come from using Ear Hustle, a podcast created by Earlonne Woods and Nigel Poor, in the classroom. Now, teachers can use their new book This is Ear Hustle to further unlock the power of storytelling.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"58638 https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/?p=58638","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/2021/10/25/listening-to-learn-why-ear-hustle-stories-about-prison-life-is-so-engaging-to-students/","disqusTitle":"Listening to learn: Why ‘Ear Hustle’ stories about prison life are so engaging to students","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","path":"/mindshift/58638/listening-to-learn-why-ear-hustle-stories-about-prison-life-is-so-engaging-to-students","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">When the podcast Ear Hustle first launched in 2017, Nigel Poor and Earlonne Woods explored the largely invisible stories inside San Quentin State Prison. While the word “prison” might make one think of felonies, violence and hardened criminals, any listener could clearly hear that the heart of the podcast is about humanity, early life choices and confronting mistakes. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">For example, \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2017/6/14/cellies\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">their first episode “Cellies”\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> is about seeking a person to safely share one's limited space. Other episodes cover topics like parents working through challenging conditions to be \u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2018/4/25/thick-glass\">present in their children's lives\u003c/a> and\u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> nurturers who care for \u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2017/7/12/looking-out\">unusual pets in a medium security facility\u003c/a>\u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Podcast fans also got to hear incarcerated people reflect on what their lives were like growing up long before they ended up in San Quentin, including stories about their relationships with family and community members. Listeners, including teachers, heard this connection and reached out to Ear Hustle’s creators to share. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“We got a lot of letters from teachers and their students talking about what they learned from the episode,” said Woods. He met Poor, a visual artist and educator, while serving a 31-years-to-life sentence at San Quentin. He served \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2018/11/22/670313799/earlonne-woods-co-host-of-ear-hustle-podcast-gets-prison-sentence-commuted\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">21 years before having his sentence commuted\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> by the governor in 2018. Educators were drawn to using Ear Hustle episodes as springboards for multimodal activities in their classrooms. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">And now there is\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://sites.prh.com/thisisearhustle\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> “This is Ear Hustle: Unflinching Stories of Everyday Prison Life,”\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> their new book about uncovering and amplifying stories about prison life and how they came together to co-host the first ever podcast produced within a prison. They also write about their experiences in school, how it shaped their lives and how it informs what they do today. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“I was one of [those] kids that learned to read way later,” said Woods. “I was the class clown to avoid being in the situations of reading, being in the situations of math, so I would just act out.” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Similarly, Poor writes about how she had dyslexia and undiagnosed learning disabilities that made school difficult even though she was naturally curious. “I've carried that with me. That idea of being told that I wasn't smart, that I couldn't do things, that I was bothersome because teachers had to explain things to me over and over again,” she said. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">With a podcast that is already rich with activities for young learners, “This is Ear Hustle” provides more accounts from incarcerated and formerly incarcerated people that students can explore in the classroom.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>How podcasts build writing skills\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Benjamin Bush, a Kentucky-based high school English teacher, started using Ear Hustle in his class because he was looking for a new way to engage his students. “The biggest problem that I think that it addresses is apathy. Getting someone to just start working on something is the hardest,” said Bush. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Ear Hustle drew in his learners because it allowed them to listen to voices other than his. They could hear from a wide range of people featured on the podcast and relate to their experiences. “We got to know the backgrounds of their lives and the things that they had struggled with through poverty and trauma, which affects a lot of our kids,” he said. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">After each episode, Bush’s students did a related writing assignment. “It allowed me to reimagine what a text is in a classroom and how multimedia exists in a classroom in the same way that a novel or a play would.” For example,\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2017/6/14/cellies\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> “Cellies”\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> examines the size of a typical prison cell (Woods’ was five feet by ten feet at San Quentin) and how to negotiate the space with a cellmate. “We all have roommates at some point in our lives,” writes Woods in his book. “We also wanted the subject to be something that everybody could relate to—whether they were in prison or in society.” In class, Bush and his students used rulers to measure out the size of a cell and did creative writing about what it would feel like to inhabit the limited space with another person. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">For another assignment, Bush brought in additional articles about solitary confinement, sentencing guidelines and parole rules for students to fuel their classroom conversations about prison systems. Later, students could choose to write a persuasive argument piece about one of the issues they talked about. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">After listening to\u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2017/8/09/catch-a-kite\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> “Catch a Kite,”\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> an episode about receiving letters, students had the opportunity to write a letter to someone in the podcast. In one letter, a student talks about how he identifies with how his letter recipient needed to commit crimes to support his family. Another student wrote about how \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2018/4/25/thick-glass\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“Thick Glass,” Ear Hustle’s episode about parenting\u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">, helped her understand dynamics within her own family. “Her father had been in and out of prison,” Bush said. “She wrote in her letter that Ear Hustle allowed her to envision her father as a good father. She was able to see him as redeemable in a way that maybe she hadn't before.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n\u003cp lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">Little Jaylen's beautiful letter. Hear his letter at the end of our most recent episode \"Thick Glass\": \u003ca href=\"https://t.co/uecEBskphM\">https://t.co/uecEBskphM\u003c/a> \u003ca href=\"https://t.co/IZVr1rPSS7\">pic.twitter.com/IZVr1rPSS7\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>— Ear Hustle Podcast (@earhustlesq) \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/earhustlesq/status/991359292174413824?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">May 1, 2018\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>\u003cscript async src=\"https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\">\u003c/script>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Connection and a sense of not being alone in hard situations are key feelings that Woods hopes to leave with young people who listen to Ear Hustle’s stories. \u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">He also thinks these connections help young people become better learners.\u003c/span>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\"> “You can benefit from someone's story,” he said. “You can have a different insight on something that will help you navigate through your life.” \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Kinetic learning and listening\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Ear Hustle co-host Nigel Poor has brought the podcast into her photography classes at California State University, Sacramento, saying its focus on storytelling primes students to slow down and build important skills in observing. “I use it to talk about storytelling and compassionate listening and building empathy, which I think are tools anybody needs no matter what they're studying.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/By0d5G4yRzM'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/By0d5G4yRzM'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">For her class, Ear Hustle is the basis of a kinetic learning experience to help students pay attention to other invisible stories. She’ll tell students to go for a walk outside and find something discarded on the ground that draws their attention. Picking up abandoned bits and pieces is part of Poor’s art practice, and when she first started volunteering at San Quentin, she would collect things from the prison’s parking lot. In the book, she describes the lot as her “hunting ground.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">In class, she’ll invite students to bring back their found object and share a story they’ve created about it. “It sounds weird at first, but it gets people to connect with their creativity and the associations that they make with objects and experiences. And that's, to me, where stories start.” She’ll then move into playing clips from Ear Hustle and discussing what people hear in them and how she and Earlonne put episodes together.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“There's so much [emphasis] put on the end result,” said Poor about education. “Listening and thinking is actually a valid activity. So I like to talk about that, and I like to talk about ways to pull stories out of people and give people the confidence to talk about themselves.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>\u003cb>Using hands-on learning to understand systems\u003c/b>\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Danielle Devencenzi, assistant principal at St. Ignatius College Prep high school in San Francisco, begins her criminal justice class by looking at major legislation that shaped the U.S. justice system such as California's Three Strikes Sentencing Law, the 1994 Crime Bill and landmark US Supreme Court cases. “Twelve years ago, I started to take my students to San Quentin to really understand the social justice issues facing our prison system in California, specifically mass incarceration,” she said.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"singleTwitterStatus","attributes":{"named":{"id":"961419775250350080"},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Hearing firsthand from incarcerated people and seeing the environment adds more depth to the books and articles they discuss as part of the class, according to Devencenzi. “I'm a firm believer that if you don't really see what's happening and really talk to the people who are impacted by our systems, then you can't really be an informed agent of change.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Devencenzi gives each of her students a notebook that they’ll use to write down their reactions, observations and notes from conversations with the people they meet on their tour of the prison. In a debrief, after visiting the prison, Devencenzi has students circle up their desks to share one thing from their notebook while she takes notes that she’ll later send to San Quentin. “They always talk about the humanity of the guys and how brave they are to tell their story in front of a bunch of complete strangers,” she said. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">When Ear Hustle first came out, her class was able to see the recording studio and meet some of the people featured in the episodes during their visits to San Quentin. “The podcast just became humanized when they met Curtis,” said Devencenzi about connecting with Curtis Roberts, who shared his story in “\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/episodes/2017/9/27/left-behind\">Left Behind\u003c/a>.” Like Woods, Roberts had his sentence commuted in 2018. “It was just a month later when Curtis actually came to my classroom and visited my students again after they had met him in the prison yard,\" said Devencenzi. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n\u003cp lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">Curtis Roberts who served a 29 year prison sentence comes to \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/StIgnatius?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">@StIgnatius\u003c/a> to speak with criminal justice students who just visited San Quentin. Check out his \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/earhustlesq?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">@earhustlesq\u003c/a> episode called Left Behind \u003ca href=\"https://t.co/MkNenCgs0Z\">pic.twitter.com/MkNenCgs0Z\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>— Danielle Devencenzi (@MsDevencenzi) \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/MsDevencenzi/status/1201586814026428418?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">December 2, 2019\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>\u003cscript async src=\"https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\">\u003c/script>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">As a culminating project, students in Devencenzi’s criminal justice class create a podcast based on in-depth interviews. Students explore their communities looking for trends and topics that – like their favorite episodes of Ear Hustle – require a little digging to uncover. \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">Woods and Poor have dreams of creating an entire Ear Hustle curriculum that includes the expanded stories and deeper dives from “This is Ear Hustle.” At Woods’ request, Poor stands up to show that she’s wearing a black one-piece jumpsuit as part of her work for an episode \u003c/span>\u003ca href=\"https://www.earhustlesq.com/challenge\">\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">about a 30-day Ear Hustle challenge. \u003c/span>\u003c/a>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">“We're asking listeners to come on this journey with us where we are eating the food that's eaten in prison during the same time and wearing three select outfits,” said Poor. “Not because we think we can replicate life in prison, but as a way to just build awareness and empathy about some of the things you give up when you go to prison.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">They think the Ear Hustle challenge, which draws on themes surfaced in the “Prison 101” chapter from “This is Ear Hustle” and an episode from season two called “The Workaround,” would be a worthwhile activity for high school students.\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400\">While stories from behind prison walls may seem to be an unlikely place to find education materials, Ear Hustle shows that there are several entry points into learning where storytelling is concerned. “There's learning through reading. There's learning through experiencing. People who don't necessarily think they're educators actually can be educators,” said Poor. “I would love for that to be a lesson of 'This is Ear Hustle': that voices really matter and that there's surprising stories everywhere that are worthy of being heard.”\u003c/span>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>MindShift is part of KQED, a non-profit NPR and PBS member station in San Francisco, CA. The text of this specific article is available to republish for noncommercial purposes under a Creative Commons \u003ca href=\"https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/\">CC BY-NC-ND 4.0\u003c/a> license, thanks to support from the William and Flora Hewlett Foundation.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/mindshift/58638/listening-to-learn-why-ear-hustle-stories-about-prison-life-is-so-engaging-to-students","authors":["11721"],"categories":["mindshift_21445"],"tags":["mindshift_20699","mindshift_20821","mindshift_243","mindshift_74","mindshift_20839","mindshift_21166","mindshift_851"],"featImg":"mindshift_58639","label":"mindshift"},"mindshift_58535":{"type":"posts","id":"mindshift_58535","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"mindshift","id":"58535","score":null,"sort":[1633590904000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"seven-ways-to-ensure-students-bring-their-whole-selves-into-the-classroom","title":"Seven ways to ensure students bring their whole selves into the classroom","publishDate":1633590904,"format":"standard","headTitle":"MindShift | KQED News","labelTerm":{"site":"mindshift"},"content":"\u003cp>\u003cem>Excerpted from \u003ca href=\"http://www.beacon.org/Ratchetdemic-P1703.aspx\">Ratchetdemic: Reimagining Academic Success\u003c/a> by Christopher Emdin (Beacon Press, 2021). Reprinted with permission from Beacon Press.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>By Christopher Emdin\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Choosing to be ratchetdemic is choosing to challenge respectability and what those who have power cherish the most—their power and the security it affords them. Being ratchetdemic is choosing to no longer be agreeable with your discomfort or the oppression of children through pedagogies that rob them of their genius, even in its most raw and unpolished forms. Most importantly, it is the restoration of the rights of the body to those who have been positioned as undeserving of them. By “the rights of the body,” I refer to seven rights articulated within Buddhist tradition. These are identified most clearly in the book \u003cem>Eastern Body, Western Mind\u003c/em>, which, although not directly related to education, can serve as a guide for teaching and learning. The seven rights of the body identify what has been denied to students when they are robbed of the opportunity to be ratchetdemic. These rights—to be here, to feel, to act, to love, to speak, to see, and to know—are at the essence of teaching and learning. Educators who anchor their teaching in the restoration of these rights to young people use their pedagogy as protest against the ways that emotional and psychological violence against young people has been normalized in schools.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The right to be here is the first and most fundamental right of the body. In education, it must be modified to the right to be here as you are. For that right to be granted, young people must feel as though their presence in the classroom, in whatever way they choose to express it, is always welcome. Ratchetdemic teaching begins by recognizing that students—especially Black students, who typically feel unwelcome in schools—have the right to be there. Their comfort and agency are compromised by the norms of the institution. Consequently, they feel as though school is not for them. this denial of the right to be here affects not just their comfort in the physical classroom but their ability to learn. The restoration of this right is a fundamental component of working with young people to become Ratchetdemic. It is accomplished in the classroom by explicitly stating when students walk into the school and/or the classroom for the first time that the entire enterprise of schooling is about them. Students must be told they have a right to be there, and they must be reminded that school is not about anything other than ensuring that they are whole and learning. This is where statements like, “This is your school,” “This is your classroom,” and “I work for you” become essential until it is understood by students that because of divine rights they have been born with, wherever their feet tread is a space they have a right to take up and are welcome.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The second right—the right to feel—is about ensuring that students have the space to express their emotions and the vocabulary to name what they are feeling. Human beings are born with the right to feel. It is an essential right to return to young people because in schools students are only afforded a very limited range of emotions. In the eyes of teachers, Black youth (in particular) can be only angry or agreeable. A number of actions that are indictors of a bevy of emotions are attributed to anger and addressed as though they are rooted in negative intentions. If Black or Brown students are curious or unclear with instructions, they are perceived as angry and questioning authority. If they are frustrated, sad, or pensive, they are perceived as angry. In fact, for too many students anything other than blind complicity is read as anger and confronted with the wrath of the institution and its operatives. The work of the educator then becomes working with young people to name their emotions—sharing the language that helps them to identify what and how they are feeling— while creating the space for these emotions to be felt and expressed without demonizing young people. This right also involves creating classroom spaces where young people can share their emotions about what is going on in the world without judgment and have a teacher who can model how to work through these emotions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The third right that must be restored to students in order for them to have the ideal learning space and be fully actualized is the right to act. Once students are afforded the right to feel, they must also have the right to act on how they feel. Being able to name how you feel must be accompanied by having the space to act on those emotions in order to feel free. As long as the act does not violate the rights of someone else, acting on an emotion is a way to feel affirmed and confirm the right to be present and take up space. In classrooms, creating space and time for the physical expression of emotions is essential. A moment in the class to scream and a corner in the class to move demonstrates a value for the students’ full self.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The fourth right of the body is the right to love and also be loved. This right is about agape love—the love of others for the good of humanity and betterment of society—and also about opening up the space for students to express a love for the people and things in their world that have significance to them even if they lack value in schools. The love of music, sports, and cultural artifacts and figures must be allowed in the classroom. The love of people and the space to express that love is also important. The work of ratchetdemic educators is to ensure that they teach about and with the artifacts and people that students love. Pedagogically, the right to love recognizes that there is no more compelling emotion than love, and there is no place where love is more needed than in learning. Activating the love young people have for phenomena that are perceived to be nonacademic in classrooms—and loving them enough to be creative and uncomfortable in uncovering the connections between those phenomena and academic content—transforms the nature of teaching and learning and restores a lost right to students.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The fifth right of the body is the right to speak. This right involves creating space where the voice of the student is not compromised or distorted in the pursuit of learning or being “better educated.” The right to speak is about being welcome to speak in one’s own tongue, dialect, or accent and honoring that right even if and when the discourse of power is different. The right to speak is not just about having voice but speaking truth to power. The ratchetdemic educator creates pathways and platforms for young people to speak about issues in the school, the community, and society to those who hold positions of power and authority. This is not about providing a voice to students. It is about amplifying their voices and providing them with access to those who hold power so that their voices can be heard. The right to speak requires creating curriculum that provides opportunities for young people to speak both within and beyond the classroom.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The sixth right is the right to see. It involves the recognition that students have the right to see things from a different perspective than the teacher or the school. The right to see is the right to have and express inner visions in the tradition of Stevie Wonder—a deep and reflective excavation of self as it relates to society and an expression of one’s vision of the world based on one’s reality. To allow young people to see things differently and then allow their visions to come to life in the classroom restores a faith in their own visions of the world and provides the classroom and the school with new approaches to transforming education to meet the needs of young people. The educator must consistently challenge students to envision the classroom and the world differently. The right to see is about activating the imagination and creating a classroom with young people that is closest to where they are most free to learn.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The seventh and final right is the right to know. In the classroom, this right is connected to the fact that schools deny Black children the right to know about themselves, their history, their legacy, and the causes for the inequities they live under. The right to know is compromised by the low expectations that teachers hold of students and the belief that students are not prepared to know about the inequities of the world or ill equipped to understand what is perceived to be rigorous academic content. The right to know is also the right to be challenged academically and to have all the information needed to understand the world shared with you. I argue that once all the other rights of the body have been provided, youth thrive when they have the right to know because their full selves are affirmed and free to accept and pursue knowledge.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_58540\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\" style=\"max-width: 200px\">\u003cimg class=\"wp-image-58540\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2021/09/Emdin_photo-credit-Laura-Yost-800x1200.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"304\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Author photo by Laura Yost (Courtesy of Beacon Press)\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Christopher Emdin is professor and program director of Science Education in the Department of Mathematics, Science, and Technology at Teachers College, Columbia University, where he also serves as associate director of the Institute for Urban and Minority Education. The creator of the #HipHopEd social media movement and the Science Genius program, he is the author of the New York Times bestseller \u003ca href=\"https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/237679/for-white-folks-who-teach-in-the-hood-and-the-rest-of-yall-too-by-christopher-emdin/\">For White Folks Who Teach in the Hood . . . and the Rest of Y’all Too\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://chrisemdin.com/product/urban-science-education-for-the-hip-hop-generation-cultural-and-historical-perspectives-on-science-education/\">Urban Science Education for the Hip-Hop Generation\u003c/a>. You can follow him on Twitter at \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/chrisemdin?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor\">@chrisemdin\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"In his book Ratchetdemic, Chris Emdin highlights the seven rights of the body as guidelines to help teachers respect the full, complex humanity of all their students.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1640029686,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":13,"wordCount":1689},"headData":{"title":"Seven ways to ensure students bring their whole selves into the classroom - MindShift","description":"In his book Ratchetdemic, Chris Emdin highlights the seven rights of the body as guidelines to help teachers respect the full, complex humanity of all their students.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"58535 https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/?p=58535","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/2021/10/07/seven-ways-to-ensure-students-bring-their-whole-selves-into-the-classroom/","disqusTitle":"Seven ways to ensure students bring their whole selves into the classroom","excludeFromSiteSearch":"Include","path":"/mindshift/58535/seven-ways-to-ensure-students-bring-their-whole-selves-into-the-classroom","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>\u003cem>Excerpted from \u003ca href=\"http://www.beacon.org/Ratchetdemic-P1703.aspx\">Ratchetdemic: Reimagining Academic Success\u003c/a> by Christopher Emdin (Beacon Press, 2021). Reprinted with permission from Beacon Press.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>By Christopher Emdin\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Choosing to be ratchetdemic is choosing to challenge respectability and what those who have power cherish the most—their power and the security it affords them. Being ratchetdemic is choosing to no longer be agreeable with your discomfort or the oppression of children through pedagogies that rob them of their genius, even in its most raw and unpolished forms. Most importantly, it is the restoration of the rights of the body to those who have been positioned as undeserving of them. By “the rights of the body,” I refer to seven rights articulated within Buddhist tradition. These are identified most clearly in the book \u003cem>Eastern Body, Western Mind\u003c/em>, which, although not directly related to education, can serve as a guide for teaching and learning. The seven rights of the body identify what has been denied to students when they are robbed of the opportunity to be ratchetdemic. These rights—to be here, to feel, to act, to love, to speak, to see, and to know—are at the essence of teaching and learning. Educators who anchor their teaching in the restoration of these rights to young people use their pedagogy as protest against the ways that emotional and psychological violence against young people has been normalized in schools.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The right to be here is the first and most fundamental right of the body. In education, it must be modified to the right to be here as you are. For that right to be granted, young people must feel as though their presence in the classroom, in whatever way they choose to express it, is always welcome. Ratchetdemic teaching begins by recognizing that students—especially Black students, who typically feel unwelcome in schools—have the right to be there. Their comfort and agency are compromised by the norms of the institution. Consequently, they feel as though school is not for them. this denial of the right to be here affects not just their comfort in the physical classroom but their ability to learn. The restoration of this right is a fundamental component of working with young people to become Ratchetdemic. It is accomplished in the classroom by explicitly stating when students walk into the school and/or the classroom for the first time that the entire enterprise of schooling is about them. Students must be told they have a right to be there, and they must be reminded that school is not about anything other than ensuring that they are whole and learning. This is where statements like, “This is your school,” “This is your classroom,” and “I work for you” become essential until it is understood by students that because of divine rights they have been born with, wherever their feet tread is a space they have a right to take up and are welcome.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The second right—the right to feel—is about ensuring that students have the space to express their emotions and the vocabulary to name what they are feeling. Human beings are born with the right to feel. It is an essential right to return to young people because in schools students are only afforded a very limited range of emotions. In the eyes of teachers, Black youth (in particular) can be only angry or agreeable. A number of actions that are indictors of a bevy of emotions are attributed to anger and addressed as though they are rooted in negative intentions. If Black or Brown students are curious or unclear with instructions, they are perceived as angry and questioning authority. If they are frustrated, sad, or pensive, they are perceived as angry. In fact, for too many students anything other than blind complicity is read as anger and confronted with the wrath of the institution and its operatives. The work of the educator then becomes working with young people to name their emotions—sharing the language that helps them to identify what and how they are feeling— while creating the space for these emotions to be felt and expressed without demonizing young people. This right also involves creating classroom spaces where young people can share their emotions about what is going on in the world without judgment and have a teacher who can model how to work through these emotions.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The third right that must be restored to students in order for them to have the ideal learning space and be fully actualized is the right to act. Once students are afforded the right to feel, they must also have the right to act on how they feel. Being able to name how you feel must be accompanied by having the space to act on those emotions in order to feel free. As long as the act does not violate the rights of someone else, acting on an emotion is a way to feel affirmed and confirm the right to be present and take up space. In classrooms, creating space and time for the physical expression of emotions is essential. A moment in the class to scream and a corner in the class to move demonstrates a value for the students’ full self.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The fourth right of the body is the right to love and also be loved. This right is about agape love—the love of others for the good of humanity and betterment of society—and also about opening up the space for students to express a love for the people and things in their world that have significance to them even if they lack value in schools. The love of music, sports, and cultural artifacts and figures must be allowed in the classroom. The love of people and the space to express that love is also important. The work of ratchetdemic educators is to ensure that they teach about and with the artifacts and people that students love. Pedagogically, the right to love recognizes that there is no more compelling emotion than love, and there is no place where love is more needed than in learning. Activating the love young people have for phenomena that are perceived to be nonacademic in classrooms—and loving them enough to be creative and uncomfortable in uncovering the connections between those phenomena and academic content—transforms the nature of teaching and learning and restores a lost right to students.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The fifth right of the body is the right to speak. This right involves creating space where the voice of the student is not compromised or distorted in the pursuit of learning or being “better educated.” The right to speak is about being welcome to speak in one’s own tongue, dialect, or accent and honoring that right even if and when the discourse of power is different. The right to speak is not just about having voice but speaking truth to power. The ratchetdemic educator creates pathways and platforms for young people to speak about issues in the school, the community, and society to those who hold positions of power and authority. This is not about providing a voice to students. It is about amplifying their voices and providing them with access to those who hold power so that their voices can be heard. The right to speak requires creating curriculum that provides opportunities for young people to speak both within and beyond the classroom.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The sixth right is the right to see. It involves the recognition that students have the right to see things from a different perspective than the teacher or the school. The right to see is the right to have and express inner visions in the tradition of Stevie Wonder—a deep and reflective excavation of self as it relates to society and an expression of one’s vision of the world based on one’s reality. To allow young people to see things differently and then allow their visions to come to life in the classroom restores a faith in their own visions of the world and provides the classroom and the school with new approaches to transforming education to meet the needs of young people. The educator must consistently challenge students to envision the classroom and the world differently. The right to see is about activating the imagination and creating a classroom with young people that is closest to where they are most free to learn.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The seventh and final right is the right to know. In the classroom, this right is connected to the fact that schools deny Black children the right to know about themselves, their history, their legacy, and the causes for the inequities they live under. The right to know is compromised by the low expectations that teachers hold of students and the belief that students are not prepared to know about the inequities of the world or ill equipped to understand what is perceived to be rigorous academic content. The right to know is also the right to be challenged academically and to have all the information needed to understand the world shared with you. I argue that once all the other rights of the body have been provided, youth thrive when they have the right to know because their full selves are affirmed and free to accept and pursue knowledge.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_58540\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\" style=\"max-width: 200px\">\u003cimg class=\"wp-image-58540\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2021/09/Emdin_photo-credit-Laura-Yost-800x1200.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"304\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Author photo by Laura Yost (Courtesy of Beacon Press)\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>Christopher Emdin is professor and program director of Science Education in the Department of Mathematics, Science, and Technology at Teachers College, Columbia University, where he also serves as associate director of the Institute for Urban and Minority Education. The creator of the #HipHopEd social media movement and the Science Genius program, he is the author of the New York Times bestseller \u003ca href=\"https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/237679/for-white-folks-who-teach-in-the-hood-and-the-rest-of-yall-too-by-christopher-emdin/\">For White Folks Who Teach in the Hood . . . and the Rest of Y’all Too\u003c/a> and \u003ca href=\"https://chrisemdin.com/product/urban-science-education-for-the-hip-hop-generation-cultural-and-historical-perspectives-on-science-education/\">Urban Science Education for the Hip-Hop Generation\u003c/a>. You can follow him on Twitter at \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/chrisemdin?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor\">@chrisemdin\u003c/a>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/mindshift/58535/seven-ways-to-ensure-students-bring-their-whole-selves-into-the-classroom","authors":["11721"],"categories":["mindshift_1"],"tags":["mindshift_21198","mindshift_21250","mindshift_21321","mindshift_20684","mindshift_20980","mindshift_698","mindshift_21036","mindshift_20699","mindshift_21223","mindshift_21449","mindshift_21213"],"featImg":"mindshift_58602","label":"mindshift"},"mindshift_57085":{"type":"posts","id":"mindshift_57085","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"mindshift","id":"57085","score":null,"sort":[1607580312000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"how-parents-can-help-kids-who-are-scared-and-anxious-during-the-pandemic","title":"How Parents Can Help Kids Who Are Scared and Anxious During the Pandemic","publishDate":1607580312,"format":"standard","headTitle":"MindShift | KQED News","labelTerm":{"site":"mindshift"},"content":"\u003cp>For the kids in our lives, the last nine months have been many things. Scary — because an invisible, unknown illness was suddenly spreading across the globe. Maybe even fun, when the possibility of school closing felt like a snow day. But for many, that novelty has given way to frustration and sadness — even depression and anxiety. Just like adults, kids are wondering: Will I get sick? Will someone I love die?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's a lot for kids \u003cem>and \u003c/em>parents to handle. So we talked to the experts and came away with five tips for how you can help your kids through this.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>Make sure your kids wear their masks\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\"Kids generally don't get very sick from this virus,\" says \u003ca href=\"https://vivo.brown.edu/display/ajha13\">Dr. Ashish Jha\u003c/a>, dean of the Brown University School of Public Health. But, he says, they can still play a part in making sure others don't get sick by wearing their masks and social distancing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It might take a little imagination. If you have younger kids, you can explain the spread of the coronavirus by comparing their mouths to a bottle of bug spray. Weird, yes — but it's one way for young ones to visualize the tiny droplets they spread, even when they aren't sick. If they wear a mask, it helps keep those droplets in.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you've got older kids or teenagers, take this a step further: Encourage them to spread the word. Practice what they might say if they're with friends at the park and someone takes their mask off. Maybe your 13-year-old has been waiting months to see Grandma and could say, \"I need to keep my Grandma safe, so do you mind putting your mask on?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Rehearse it with your kids so the conversation goes smoothly.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>Practice positive thinking and mindfulness\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>In a recent report, \u003ca href=\"https://www.calpartnersproject.org/arethekidsalright\">researchers interviewed 46 teenagers in California\u003c/a> and found that the teens reported a huge sense of loss — similar to the stages of grief. Most of the teens were sleeping badly because of lack of activity and lots of screen time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kids of all ages — as well as their parents — can probably relate.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In addition to the obvious prescription — trade in some of that screen time for physical exercise — try some \u003cem>brain\u003c/em> exercises too, like replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. You might try saying a few things you're grateful for each night before dinner or before bed. There's evidence behind that: Gratitude boosts your immune system, lowers blood pressure and motivates us to practice healthy habits. It may feel awkward or cheesy, but practicing mindfulness and positivity very consciously can help kids and parents too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's also important to watch for signs of something more serious too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"Depression in teenagers sometimes looks like a prickly porcupine. Everybody rubs them the wrong way,\" adolescent psychologist \u003ca href=\"https://www.drlisadamour.com/\">Lisa Damour\u003c/a> says. Don't take it personally; just keep offering them a listening ear.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>Meet tough moments with empathy\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>There will be times when feelings bubble up. Meltdowns will happen. In those moments, \u003ca href=\"http://guidedsurrender.com/\">wellness guide Frannie Williams\u003c/a> says, take a moment to put yourself in your child's shoes. If they're acting like it's the end of the world, well it might be because their world has turned upside down this year.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She says that to help kids calm down, parents have to calm down too. Once she was working with a 5-year-old who was struggling. Williams began taking deep breaths, and \"Out of nowhere, I noticed that she was mimicking me,\" Williams remembers. \"She was modeling me. She started taking these big belly deep breaths.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.sesameworkshop.org/who-we-are/our-leadership/rosemarie-truglio\">Rosemarie Truglio\u003c/a>, senior vice president of curriculum and content at Sesame Workshop, says kids learn a lot about dealing with adversity by watching adults. \"And they're seeing how we are reacting to setbacks, mistakes and challenges,\" Truglio explains. \"So this is a big message for adults, because our actions are speaking a lot louder than our words.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>Find new ways of connecting with people\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Your kids are almost certainly missing out on some socializing — with friends and extended family. Get creative about making time for reestablishing some of those lost connections. It will help your children, it will help you and it will likely help the people you're reconnecting with.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.medschool.lsuhsc.edu/pediatrics/faculty_detail.aspx?name=osofsky_joy\">Joy Osofsky\u003c/a>, a professor at Louisiana State University School of Medicine in New Orleans, says her grandkids, who live outside the U.S., call her every morning on their way to school so they can play online games together. It's time that both Osofsky and her grandkids have come to cherish.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>Get more safe physical contact\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Damour says that kids, even teens, are likely missing out on lots of the physical contact they normally get — contact that can't be replicated over Zoom or WhatsApp. Keep that in mind, and don't hold back on the physical affection — the hugs, the pillow fights, the hair ruffles, all of it.\u003c/p>\n\u003chr>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>The podcast portion of this episode was produced by \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/people/895086511/meghan-keane\">\u003cem>Meghan Keane\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>We'd love to hear from you. Leave us a voicemail at 202-216-9823, or email us at LifeKit@npr.org.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>For more Life Kit, \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/newsletter/life-kit\">\u003cem>subscribe to our newsletter\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">Copyright 2020 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=Kids+Are+Anxious+And+Scared+During+The+Pandemic.+Here%27s+How+Parents+Can+Help&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/div>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Kids and teens have had their lives upended by the COVID-19 pandemic. Here's what parents can do to help them stay positive and feel supported.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1607580312,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":22,"wordCount":891},"headData":{"title":"How Parents Can Help Kids Who Are Scared and Anxious During the Pandemic - MindShift","description":"Kids and teens have had their lives upended by the COVID-19 pandemic. Here's what parents can do to help them stay positive and feel supported.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"57085 https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/?p=57085","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/2020/12/09/how-parents-can-help-kids-who-are-scared-and-anxious-during-the-pandemic/","disqusTitle":"How Parents Can Help Kids Who Are Scared and Anxious During the Pandemic","nprImageCredit":"Ada daSilva","nprByline":"Anya Kamenetz, Cory Turner, Meghan Keane","nprImageAgency":"Getty Images","nprStoryId":"944305912","nprApiLink":"http://api.npr.org/query?id=944305912&profileTypeId=15&apiKey=MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004","nprHtmlLink":"https://www.npr.org/2020/12/08/944305912/kids-are-anxious-and-scared-during-the-pandemic-heres-how-parents-can-help?ft=nprml&f=944305912","nprRetrievedStory":"1","nprPubDate":"Thu, 10 Dec 2020 00:03:00 -0500","nprStoryDate":"Thu, 10 Dec 2020 00:03:30 -0500","nprLastModifiedDate":"Wed, 09 Dec 2020 19:26:22 -0500","nprAudio":"https://ondemand.npr.org/anon.npr-podcasts/podcast/npr/lifekit/2020/12/20201210_lifekit_life_kit_-_talking_covid_with_kids__-_final-269bca31-840f-45f0-b62e-988f8b60e99a.mp3?orgId=1&topicId=1013&aggIds=676529561&d=1285&p=510338&story=944305912&t=podcast&e=944305912&ft=nprml&f=944305912","nprAudioM3u":"http://api.npr.org/m3u/1944764445-8294fb.m3u?orgId=1&topicId=1013&aggIds=676529561&d=1285&p=510338&story=944305912&t=podcast&e=944305912&ft=nprml&f=944305912","path":"/mindshift/57085/how-parents-can-help-kids-who-are-scared-and-anxious-during-the-pandemic","audioUrl":"https://ondemand.npr.org/anon.npr-podcasts/podcast/npr/lifekit/2020/12/20201210_lifekit_life_kit_-_talking_covid_with_kids__-_final-269bca31-840f-45f0-b62e-988f8b60e99a.mp3?orgId=1&topicId=1013&aggIds=676529561&d=1285&p=510338&story=944305912&t=podcast&e=944305912&ft=nprml&f=944305912","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>For the kids in our lives, the last nine months have been many things. Scary — because an invisible, unknown illness was suddenly spreading across the globe. Maybe even fun, when the possibility of school closing felt like a snow day. But for many, that novelty has given way to frustration and sadness — even depression and anxiety. Just like adults, kids are wondering: Will I get sick? Will someone I love die?\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's a lot for kids \u003cem>and \u003c/em>parents to handle. So we talked to the experts and came away with five tips for how you can help your kids through this.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>Make sure your kids wear their masks\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>\"Kids generally don't get very sick from this virus,\" says \u003ca href=\"https://vivo.brown.edu/display/ajha13\">Dr. Ashish Jha\u003c/a>, dean of the Brown University School of Public Health. But, he says, they can still play a part in making sure others don't get sick by wearing their masks and social distancing.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It might take a little imagination. If you have younger kids, you can explain the spread of the coronavirus by comparing their mouths to a bottle of bug spray. Weird, yes — but it's one way for young ones to visualize the tiny droplets they spread, even when they aren't sick. If they wear a mask, it helps keep those droplets in.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>If you've got older kids or teenagers, take this a step further: Encourage them to spread the word. Practice what they might say if they're with friends at the park and someone takes their mask off. Maybe your 13-year-old has been waiting months to see Grandma and could say, \"I need to keep my Grandma safe, so do you mind putting your mask on?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Rehearse it with your kids so the conversation goes smoothly.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>Practice positive thinking and mindfulness\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>In a recent report, \u003ca href=\"https://www.calpartnersproject.org/arethekidsalright\">researchers interviewed 46 teenagers in California\u003c/a> and found that the teens reported a huge sense of loss — similar to the stages of grief. Most of the teens were sleeping badly because of lack of activity and lots of screen time.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Kids of all ages — as well as their parents — can probably relate.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In addition to the obvious prescription — trade in some of that screen time for physical exercise — try some \u003cem>brain\u003c/em> exercises too, like replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. You might try saying a few things you're grateful for each night before dinner or before bed. There's evidence behind that: Gratitude boosts your immune system, lowers blood pressure and motivates us to practice healthy habits. It may feel awkward or cheesy, but practicing mindfulness and positivity very consciously can help kids and parents too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's also important to watch for signs of something more serious too.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"Depression in teenagers sometimes looks like a prickly porcupine. Everybody rubs them the wrong way,\" adolescent psychologist \u003ca href=\"https://www.drlisadamour.com/\">Lisa Damour\u003c/a> says. Don't take it personally; just keep offering them a listening ear.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>Meet tough moments with empathy\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>There will be times when feelings bubble up. Meltdowns will happen. In those moments, \u003ca href=\"http://guidedsurrender.com/\">wellness guide Frannie Williams\u003c/a> says, take a moment to put yourself in your child's shoes. If they're acting like it's the end of the world, well it might be because their world has turned upside down this year.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>She says that to help kids calm down, parents have to calm down too. Once she was working with a 5-year-old who was struggling. Williams began taking deep breaths, and \"Out of nowhere, I noticed that she was mimicking me,\" Williams remembers. \"She was modeling me. She started taking these big belly deep breaths.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.sesameworkshop.org/who-we-are/our-leadership/rosemarie-truglio\">Rosemarie Truglio\u003c/a>, senior vice president of curriculum and content at Sesame Workshop, says kids learn a lot about dealing with adversity by watching adults. \"And they're seeing how we are reacting to setbacks, mistakes and challenges,\" Truglio explains. \"So this is a big message for adults, because our actions are speaking a lot louder than our words.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>Find new ways of connecting with people\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Your kids are almost certainly missing out on some socializing — with friends and extended family. Get creative about making time for reestablishing some of those lost connections. It will help your children, it will help you and it will likely help the people you're reconnecting with.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003ca href=\"https://www.medschool.lsuhsc.edu/pediatrics/faculty_detail.aspx?name=osofsky_joy\">Joy Osofsky\u003c/a>, a professor at Louisiana State University School of Medicine in New Orleans, says her grandkids, who live outside the U.S., call her every morning on their way to school so they can play online games together. It's time that both Osofsky and her grandkids have come to cherish.\u003c/p>\n\u003ch2>Get more safe physical contact\u003c/h2>\n\u003cp>Damour says that kids, even teens, are likely missing out on lots of the physical contact they normally get — contact that can't be replicated over Zoom or WhatsApp. Keep that in mind, and don't hold back on the physical affection — the hugs, the pillow fights, the hair ruffles, all of it.\u003c/p>\n\u003chr>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>The podcast portion of this episode was produced by \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/people/895086511/meghan-keane\">\u003cem>Meghan Keane\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>We'd love to hear from you. Leave us a voicemail at 202-216-9823, or email us at LifeKit@npr.org.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cem>For more Life Kit, \u003c/em>\u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/newsletter/life-kit\">\u003cem>subscribe to our newsletter\u003c/em>\u003c/a>\u003cem>.\u003c/em>\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">Copyright 2020 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=Kids+Are+Anxious+And+Scared+During+The+Pandemic.+Here%27s+How+Parents+Can+Help&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/mindshift/57085/how-parents-can-help-kids-who-are-scared-and-anxious-during-the-pandemic","authors":["byline_mindshift_57085"],"categories":["mindshift_21280"],"tags":["mindshift_21344","mindshift_21343","mindshift_358","mindshift_20699","mindshift_20865","mindshift_841"],"featImg":"mindshift_57086","label":"mindshift"},"mindshift_55031":{"type":"posts","id":"mindshift_55031","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"mindshift","id":"55031","score":null,"sort":[1576135407000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"a-video-game-about-conflict-resolution-helps-develop-empathy-for-refugees","title":"A Video Game About Conflict Resolution Helps Develop Empathy for Refugees","publishDate":1576135407,"format":"standard","headTitle":"MindShift | KQED News","labelTerm":{"site":"mindshift"},"content":"\u003cp>Lual Mayen, a video game developer based in Washington, D.C., remembers the first time he saw a computer. He was just a kid at the time. It was 2007, and his family was registering for benefits at a refugee camp in Uganda, where they'd settled after fleeing civil war in South Sudan.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He didn't tell anyone at first, but in that moment he knew in his heart that he wanted to learn to code, he says. More than a decade later, Mayen is garnering international recognition from Facebook and the global gaming community for an innovative video game that brings players into the life of a refugee. The latest version of the game — called \"Salaam,\" which means \"peace\" in Arabic — will be released on Thursday.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But before that could happen, Mayen had to get his mom to take him seriously.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When he eventually confessed his dream to his mother, he says she laughed at him. \"She looked at me like I was crazy. 'What are you going to do with a computer? Who's gonna train you?' But because she was a mother to me, she didn't discourage me.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayen says his mother quietly began putting away part of her earnings from mending clothes for other refugees at the camp. After three years she saved $300 and surprised him with a laptop.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayen was astonished and grateful for the gift, but he says it also came with a downside. He worried that if he didn't take advantage of her gift, his mother would take his or his brothers' desires less seriously. Also, he wasn't sure where to begin learning to use it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>His first hurdle to mastering the computer was simple but significant: finding a place to charge it. He eventually found a generator in a distant part of the refugee camp and says he walked three hours each direction to get there every day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Next, he needed instruction. He couldn't access the Internet, but a friend gave him coding tutorials loaded onto a flash drive. That same friend also gave him a copy of his first video game: Grand Theft Auto.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayen says he was drawn to the game, which is famously violent, but \"I felt like this is what is actually happening in my country. This is war.\" He started to wonder what if, instead of a game that encourages players to take violent actions, \"I could make the same thing happen, but for peace and conflict resolution?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That was the inspiration for the mobile phone game, Salaam, which he spent the following months creating. In the game, players take on the identity of a refugee escaping a conflict zone and have to gather resources like food and medicine while running away from violence to stay alive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_55033\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 1920px\">\u003cimg class=\"size-full wp-image-55033\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2019/12/game_diptych-1_custom-2142cdda5f1e85ab4862af63c1216e17e1da8b32-e1576134958974.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1920\" height=\"1169\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Screen shots of Salaam. Players gather resources like food and medicine while running away from violence to stay alive. \u003ccite>(Salaam Game)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Mayen shared the game on his Facebook page, and that's when he started attracting international attention. Most notably, more than 26 million people watched via livestream as Mayen was \u003ca href=\"https://www.facebook.com/fbgaminghome/blog/the-game-awards-2018-recognizing-this-years-global-gaming-citizens\">named a Global Gaming Citizen\u003c/a> at the 2018 Game Awards in Los Angeles, for using gaming to promote \"positivity\" and community.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Even within that category Mayen is a standout, says Leo Olebe. He's the global director of games partnerships at Facebook, which co-developed the Global Gaming Citizen category for the Game Awards. \"In the games business, it's really easy to fall back on orcs and goblins,\" says Olebe. \"It's really hard to take this throughline of peace and conflict resolution and carry it through everything that you do. And Lual does that. It's mind-blowing stuff.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayen is now focused on bringing Salaam to a larger audience by releasing an enhanced version on Facebook Instant Games, through the company he created, \u003ca href=\"https://junubgames.com/\">Junub Games\u003c/a>. His vision is to use the game to inspire empathy for refugees. And he says he's working on a charitable component so that when players make in-app purchases of extra resources in the game, a portion would go to a grassroots organization at a refugee camp. As people pay to \"stay alive\" a little longer in the game, they're supporting actual refugees' lives.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Olebe says so-called \"social impact games\" like Salaam are a category that has the potential to push the industry to expand its definition of success.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"Lual is actually making a difference in this world by inspiring people to be better,\" he says. \"That's a very different and important metric relative to retention rates or lifetime value of a player or other things people talk about more often in the games industry. I don't even know how you place a value on helping somebody better understand the world. He's playing a whole different game altogether.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_55034\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 1920px\">\u003cimg class=\"size-full wp-image-55034\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2019/12/20191104_dull_videogame-128-2_custom-a2559173009cbcff5a21ee7c7514f58a78281b2f-e1576135007615.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1920\" height=\"1498\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">South Sudanese refugee Lual Mayen explains his video game during a visit to NPR. \u003ccite>(Catie Dull/NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Games where a player takes on another person's perspective or becomes immersed in a specific environment can be beneficial in building positive interpersonal relationships, according to \u003ca href=\"https://centerhealthyminds.org/about/people/tammi-kral\">Tammi Kral\u003c/a>, a research assistant at the Center for Healthy Minds at University of Wisconsin-Madison who is not affiliated with Junub Games or Salaam. Kral says that as video game developers explore the potential for games to inspire \"prosocial\" behavior, they would do well to collaborate with psychologists and behavioral scientists who understand the impact of games on specific brain networks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The video game also comes at a time when the Trump administration has \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2019/09/26/764839236/trump-administration-drastically-cuts-number-of-refugees-allowed-to-enter-the-u\">slashed the number of refugees\u003c/a> who will be permitted to resettle in the U.S. in the coming year by nearly half to 18,000 — a record low since the modern refugee program was established in 1980.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Building empathy for refugees is especially pressing \"under an administration that overtly expresses anti-immigrant sentiment and promulgates harmful policies against refugees and immigrants,\" says Rachel Landry, acting director of refugee resettlement and asylum policy and advocacy at the \u003ca href=\"https://www.rescue.org/\">International Rescue Committee.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayen says Junub plans to premiere the newer, enhanced version of Salaam on December 12 during the livestream of the 2019 Game Awards. He says the main objective of the game remains the same: taking a character from a war-torn environment to a peaceful context that's left intentionally undefined.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"It's not a country. It's not a camp. It's just a place you can have peace of mind,\" he says. \"It's not about the destination. The main thing is helping people understand the journey of the refugee and to have empathy for what refugees have to go through.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=A+Kid+In+A+Refugee+Camp+Thought+Video+Games+Fell+From+Heaven.+Now+He+Makes+Them&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/div>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Lual Mayen grew up in a camp in Uganda. Now he's the award-winning CEO of a game development company in Washington, D.C., that has just released 'Salaam' — a game about refugees and peace.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1576135534,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":22,"wordCount":1128},"headData":{"title":"A Video Game About Conflict Resolution Helps Develop Empathy for Refugees | KQED","description":"Lual Mayen grew up in a camp in Uganda. Now he's the award-winning CEO of a game development company in Washington, D.C., that has just released 'Salaam' — a game about refugees and peace.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"55031 https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/?p=55031","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/2019/12/11/a-video-game-about-conflict-resolution-helps-develop-empathy-for-refugees/","disqusTitle":"A Video Game About Conflict Resolution Helps Develop Empathy for Refugees","nprImageCredit":"Catie Dull","nprByline":"Emily Vaughn","nprImageAgency":"NPR","nprStoryId":"786740227","nprApiLink":"http://api.npr.org/query?id=786740227&apiKey=MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004","nprHtmlLink":"https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2019/12/11/786740227/a-kid-in-a-refugee-camp-thought-video-games-fell-from-heaven-now-he-makes-them?ft=nprml&f=786740227","nprRetrievedStory":"1","nprPubDate":"Wed, 11 Dec 2019 12:00:00 -0500","nprStoryDate":"Wed, 11 Dec 2019 12:00:48 -0500","nprLastModifiedDate":"Wed, 11 Dec 2019 12:00:48 -0500","path":"/mindshift/55031/a-video-game-about-conflict-resolution-helps-develop-empathy-for-refugees","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Lual Mayen, a video game developer based in Washington, D.C., remembers the first time he saw a computer. He was just a kid at the time. It was 2007, and his family was registering for benefits at a refugee camp in Uganda, where they'd settled after fleeing civil war in South Sudan.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He didn't tell anyone at first, but in that moment he knew in his heart that he wanted to learn to code, he says. More than a decade later, Mayen is garnering international recognition from Facebook and the global gaming community for an innovative video game that brings players into the life of a refugee. The latest version of the game — called \"Salaam,\" which means \"peace\" in Arabic — will be released on Thursday.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But before that could happen, Mayen had to get his mom to take him seriously.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When he eventually confessed his dream to his mother, he says she laughed at him. \"She looked at me like I was crazy. 'What are you going to do with a computer? Who's gonna train you?' But because she was a mother to me, she didn't discourage me.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayen says his mother quietly began putting away part of her earnings from mending clothes for other refugees at the camp. After three years she saved $300 and surprised him with a laptop.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayen was astonished and grateful for the gift, but he says it also came with a downside. He worried that if he didn't take advantage of her gift, his mother would take his or his brothers' desires less seriously. Also, he wasn't sure where to begin learning to use it.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>His first hurdle to mastering the computer was simple but significant: finding a place to charge it. He eventually found a generator in a distant part of the refugee camp and says he walked three hours each direction to get there every day.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Next, he needed instruction. He couldn't access the Internet, but a friend gave him coding tutorials loaded onto a flash drive. That same friend also gave him a copy of his first video game: Grand Theft Auto.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayen says he was drawn to the game, which is famously violent, but \"I felt like this is what is actually happening in my country. This is war.\" He started to wonder what if, instead of a game that encourages players to take violent actions, \"I could make the same thing happen, but for peace and conflict resolution?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>That was the inspiration for the mobile phone game, Salaam, which he spent the following months creating. In the game, players take on the identity of a refugee escaping a conflict zone and have to gather resources like food and medicine while running away from violence to stay alive.\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_55033\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 1920px\">\u003cimg class=\"size-full wp-image-55033\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2019/12/game_diptych-1_custom-2142cdda5f1e85ab4862af63c1216e17e1da8b32-e1576134958974.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1920\" height=\"1169\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">Screen shots of Salaam. Players gather resources like food and medicine while running away from violence to stay alive. \u003ccite>(Salaam Game)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Mayen shared the game on his Facebook page, and that's when he started attracting international attention. Most notably, more than 26 million people watched via livestream as Mayen was \u003ca href=\"https://www.facebook.com/fbgaminghome/blog/the-game-awards-2018-recognizing-this-years-global-gaming-citizens\">named a Global Gaming Citizen\u003c/a> at the 2018 Game Awards in Los Angeles, for using gaming to promote \"positivity\" and community.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Even within that category Mayen is a standout, says Leo Olebe. He's the global director of games partnerships at Facebook, which co-developed the Global Gaming Citizen category for the Game Awards. \"In the games business, it's really easy to fall back on orcs and goblins,\" says Olebe. \"It's really hard to take this throughline of peace and conflict resolution and carry it through everything that you do. And Lual does that. It's mind-blowing stuff.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayen is now focused on bringing Salaam to a larger audience by releasing an enhanced version on Facebook Instant Games, through the company he created, \u003ca href=\"https://junubgames.com/\">Junub Games\u003c/a>. His vision is to use the game to inspire empathy for refugees. And he says he's working on a charitable component so that when players make in-app purchases of extra resources in the game, a portion would go to a grassroots organization at a refugee camp. As people pay to \"stay alive\" a little longer in the game, they're supporting actual refugees' lives.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Olebe says so-called \"social impact games\" like Salaam are a category that has the potential to push the industry to expand its definition of success.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"Lual is actually making a difference in this world by inspiring people to be better,\" he says. \"That's a very different and important metric relative to retention rates or lifetime value of a player or other things people talk about more often in the games industry. I don't even know how you place a value on helping somebody better understand the world. He's playing a whole different game altogether.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cfigure id=\"attachment_55034\" class=\"wp-caption alignnone\" style=\"max-width: 1920px\">\u003cimg class=\"size-full wp-image-55034\" src=\"https://ww2.kqed.org/app/uploads/sites/23/2019/12/20191104_dull_videogame-128-2_custom-a2559173009cbcff5a21ee7c7514f58a78281b2f-e1576135007615.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"1920\" height=\"1498\">\u003cfigcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\">South Sudanese refugee Lual Mayen explains his video game during a visit to NPR. \u003ccite>(Catie Dull/NPR)\u003c/cite>\u003c/figcaption>\u003c/figure>\n\u003cp>Games where a player takes on another person's perspective or becomes immersed in a specific environment can be beneficial in building positive interpersonal relationships, according to \u003ca href=\"https://centerhealthyminds.org/about/people/tammi-kral\">Tammi Kral\u003c/a>, a research assistant at the Center for Healthy Minds at University of Wisconsin-Madison who is not affiliated with Junub Games or Salaam. Kral says that as video game developers explore the potential for games to inspire \"prosocial\" behavior, they would do well to collaborate with psychologists and behavioral scientists who understand the impact of games on specific brain networks.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The video game also comes at a time when the Trump administration has \u003ca href=\"https://www.npr.org/2019/09/26/764839236/trump-administration-drastically-cuts-number-of-refugees-allowed-to-enter-the-u\">slashed the number of refugees\u003c/a> who will be permitted to resettle in the U.S. in the coming year by nearly half to 18,000 — a record low since the modern refugee program was established in 1980.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Building empathy for refugees is especially pressing \"under an administration that overtly expresses anti-immigrant sentiment and promulgates harmful policies against refugees and immigrants,\" says Rachel Landry, acting director of refugee resettlement and asylum policy and advocacy at the \u003ca href=\"https://www.rescue.org/\">International Rescue Committee.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Mayen says Junub plans to premiere the newer, enhanced version of Salaam on December 12 during the livestream of the 2019 Game Awards. He says the main objective of the game remains the same: taking a character from a war-torn environment to a peaceful context that's left intentionally undefined.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"It's not a country. It's not a camp. It's just a place you can have peace of mind,\" he says. \"It's not about the destination. The main thing is helping people understand the journey of the refugee and to have empathy for what refugees have to go through.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=A+Kid+In+A+Refugee+Camp+Thought+Video+Games+Fell+From+Heaven.+Now+He+Makes+Them&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/mindshift/55031/a-video-game-about-conflict-resolution-helps-develop-empathy-for-refugees","authors":["byline_mindshift_55031"],"categories":["mindshift_192"],"tags":["mindshift_20699","mindshift_20701","mindshift_20784","mindshift_1040","mindshift_282","mindshift_548","mindshift_20655","mindshift_943"],"featImg":"mindshift_55032","label":"mindshift"},"mindshift_54497":{"type":"posts","id":"mindshift_54497","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"mindshift","id":"54497","score":null,"sort":[1570773656000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"why-intentionally-building-empathy-is-more-important-now-than-ever","title":"Why Intentionally Building Empathy Is More Important Now Than Ever","publishDate":1570773656,"format":"standard","headTitle":"MindShift | KQED News","labelTerm":{"site":"mindshift"},"content":"\u003cp>Many people believe that life is a zero-sum game and that the most ruthless people get the furthest. But Jamil Zaki, a Stanford psychologist and author of \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/550616/the-war-for-kindness-by-jamil-zaki/9780451499240/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">The War for Kindness: Building Empathy in a Fractured World\u003c/a>\u003c/em>, says there's a lot of evidence to the contrary.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“It turns out that nice guys finish first in lots of different ways,” Zaki said on \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/forum/2010101872598/empathy-as-a-radical-act\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">KQED’s Forum program\u003c/a>. And, when people are nice, they not only help others, but they help themselves as well. \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/36448/why-its-imperative-to-teach-empathy-to-boys\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Empathetic people are generally happier\u003c/a>, healthier and more effective at work. And, acting from a place of empathy, he argues, could be just what the world needs at this moment, when division has become the norm.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He points to the case of a former Canadian white supremacist, \u003ca href=\"https://www.theforgivenessproject.com/tony-mcaleer\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Tony McAleer\u003c/a>, who turned to a mentor when he was trying to leave that lifestyle. He confessed his participation in groups like White Aryan Resistance (WAR) and his role as a recruiter for them. He didn’t realize that his mentor, \u003ca href=\"https://fullmontyleadership.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Dov Baron\u003c/a>, was Jewish. When McAleer learned this fact, he immediately felt shame and disconnection, but rather than judging him, Baron had compassion for his struggle. Zaki writes about this act of empathy in his book:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>\"‘Here was this man who loved me and wanted to heal me, and here was I, a person who had once advocated for the annihilation of his people.’ Tony felt he didn’t deserve a shred of compassion from Dov, but Dov extended it nonetheless. This cracked Tony open. He’d created a surface of hatred to cover his shame and loneliness. Once someone accepted him warts and all, he no longer needed it.”\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Dov Baron's empathetic response to McAleer’s hate helped set him on a different path. When Baron showed compassion, it made a bigger impact than shunning McAleer. It opened up an opportunity for dialogue and growth. McAleer now runs an organization called \u003ca href=\"https://www.lifeafterhate.org/about-us-page\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Life After Hate\u003c/a> to help other people leave hate groups.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"I truly feel that the cultural forces that are pushing us apart are so vast and so prevalent that acting with empathy, and trying to connect despite them, is a radical act,\" Zaki said. “It takes pushing back against something in order to reclaim that common humanity.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He points \u003ca href=\"https://faculty.chicagobooth.edu/eob/edobrien_empathyPSPR.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">to evidence\u003c/a> that empathy has been declining over the past 30 years. Psychologists measure empathy through self-reported surveys. Participants rate themselves on a scale of one to five on various questions like: “I often have tender, concerned feelings for people less fortunate than me” or “I try to think about everyone’s side of a disagreement before I make a decision.” The scores are averaged to get a total empathy score.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In 1979, the average American’s total empathy score was a four out of five, a “solid B.” In 2009, thirty years later, the average American scored a three out of five. In practical terms, Zaki says Americans in 2009 are 75-percent less empathetic than their counterparts thirty years ago. Studies like these stoke his concern about empathy erosion.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[pullquote size='medium' align='right' citation='Jamil Zaki, Stanford psychologist and author of \u003cem>The War For Kindness\u003c/em>']'I truly feel that the cultural forces that are pushing us apart are so vast and so prevalent that acting with empathy, and trying to connect despite them, is a radical act. It takes pushing back against something in order to reclaim that common humanity.'[/pullquote]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I don’t argue that what we want is maximal empathy at all times,” Zaki said. “If you felt everyone’s pain at all times, you wouldn’t make it down one block in San Francisco without falling down in a heap.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And, he recognizes that there are many professions that experience empathy fatigue, which is why he thinks empathy is a skill and a tool that needs to be cultivated and used at the right times. Part of functioning in this world is to know when to fall back and when to employ empathy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Those in helping professions like teaching, social work, or medicine \u003ca href=\"https://tspace.library.utoronto.ca/bitstream/1807/80997/1/Regehr%20strategies%20for%20reducing%20secondary%20or%20vicarious%20trauma.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">can buffer themselves from burnout\u003c/a> and “compassion fatigue” with self-care strategies, including meditation and \u003ca href=\"https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19293416\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">social support\u003c/a>. A \u003ca href=\"https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/15548253\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">study\u003c/a> of nurses in acute mental health settings found staff support groups helped buffer the nurses, but only if they were structured to minimize negative communication and focused on talking about challenges in constructive ways.\u003cbr>\n\u003cstrong>\u003cbr>\nConcerns About Simplistic Definitions of Empathy\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>English Professor Cris Beam also studies empathy and wrote a book called, \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.crisbeam.com/i-feel-you\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">I Feel You: The Surprising Power of Extreme Empathy\u003c/a>\u003c/em>. She notes that there are many definitions of empathy. Some of the earliest, and simplest ones, characterize empathy as the ability to “stand in another’s shoes.” \u003ca href=\"https://brenebrown.com/about/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Brené Brown\u003c/a>, who has recently popularized empathy, defines it as \"\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/47502/empathy-is-tough-to-teach-but-is-one-of-the-most-important-life-lessons\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">feeling with people\u003c/a>,\" and notes that it's a \"vulnerable choice\" because it requires a person to tap into something personal that identifies with the struggle of another.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While researching South Africa, Beam came across another definition of empathy she finds powerful: Empathy is a disruption of power. She described the case of \u003ca href=\"https://www.theguardian.com/stage/2014/jun/09/eugene-de-kock-apartheid-a-human-being-died-that-night\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Eugene de Kock\u003c/a>, an apartheid-era assassin responsible for the deaths of dozens of black activists. South African authorities \u003ca href=\"https://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/jan/30/south-africa-eugene-de-kock-released-prime-evil\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">released de Kock\u003c/a> from prison after he had served 20 years, in part because some families of his victims supported the move. They felt de Kock held too much power as the embodiment of evil, and that it kept other South Africans from reflecting on their own role in apartheid.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We can think about empathy as a way to not only look at the other, but to look at ourselves,” Beam said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Beam contends that empathy is a moral position, not a discrete set of skills, as it is sometimes taught. She says empathy can be strengthened, but before that a person must be grounded in an empathetic understanding that often comes from literature, art and theater. Yale professor \u003ca href=\"https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2013/05/20/the-baby-in-the-well\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Paul Bloom is also critical of the emphasis on empathy\u003c/a>, arguing that it's easier to empathetic towards individuals, leading society to make important policy decisions based on emotion instead of facts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I worry about [empathy] being taught as a skill because it should be something of a core identity and a way of moving through the world,” said Beam.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some of her concern comes from the way that empathy has been co-opted by the business world. Terms like “empathetic design” and “empathetic marketing” repel her. She sees these as attempts to isolate the consumer, and provide them with exactly what they want, when they want it, as antithetical to a core part of deeper empathy – connection.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Could Empathy Change Systems? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamil Zaki agrees with Beam that deep empathy is about connection. But his research shows that empathy can be developed, like a muscle. And, he thinks that could affect the world positively not only at the individual level, but in things like police training.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In his book, Zaki describes how Washington State’s police trainer, Sue Rahr, used the \u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/sf/investigative/2015/12/10/new-style-of-police-training-aims-to-produce-guardians-not-warriors/?utm_term=.78d88f52ab07\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">power of social norms to reduce use-of-force \u003c/a>among police there. She recognized that many police saw themselves as “warriors,” a social norm that could push new recruits who signed up to police with altruistic motives into believing they need to show dominance at all times. Rahr pushed back against that norm, training police to work with the community instead of against them. Psychologists recently chose 300 police officers working in high-need areas of Seattle and ran them through Rahr’s program. They found those officers \u003ca href=\"https://www.ncjrs.gov/pdffiles1/nij/grants/249881.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">used force 30 percent less often\u003c/a> than their peers. And, \u003ca href=\"https://www.seattleu.edu/media/college-of-arts-and-sciences/departments/criminaljustice/crimeandjusticeresearchcenter/documents/Helfgott-and-Hickman-2019_Longitudinal-Continuation-The-Effect-of-Guardian-Focused-Training-for-LE.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">other studies\u003c/a> have shown police who went through the training have more knowledge about how to deal with someone in a behavioral crisis and more emotional intelligence.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Still, Zaki is quick to point out the empathy can’t solve everything. Many of the most pernicious problems are structural, not individual, and no amount of individual empathy can solve them. The policing story is a good example of that – while Rahr’s training takes steps in the right direction it doesn’t solve all the problems with policing, including racial bias. Citizens appreciated attempts to change policing, but were still upset that police officers who did use force were rarely prosecuted.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Stress Makes It Hard To Be Empathetic\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Stress inhibits people’s ability to be empathetic. Zaki points out irony here. Many psychologists say human connection is one of the best ways to move past pain or trauma, the very things that keep people from opening up to empathy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Often times when we experience stress, we feel that we’re in a rush in order to survive for ourselves, we become untuned to the needs of others,” Zaki said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A \u003ca href=\"https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/creativity-the-art-and-science/201909/how-get-students-persist\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">famous study\u003c/a> conducted in the ‘70s by Princeton researchers John Darley and Daniel Batson asked seminary students to write a sermon about the parable of the good Samaritan. They were then told to go across campus to deliver the sermon. Unbeknownst to the study participants, an actor lurked along the route they would take, and acted as though he required help. Half the participants had been told to take their time getting to the location for the sermon and the other half had been told they were in a rush.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sixty to 70-percent of the seminary students in the “non-rush” condition stopped to help. Only 10-percent of those in the “rush” condition did so.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Sometimes one of the most important things is to cue ourselves in for one moment and recognize that there’s a full person on the other side of this interaction,” Zaki said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He sees enormous potential in the internet to connect people, but is also aware that often communication through the internet has the effect of dehumanizing the person on the other side of the exchange. When we interact online, we can’t see the usual cues that indicate to us how the other person is reacting to what we’re saying. That makes it easier to be cruel and to not listen.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But it’s not all bad news. Empathy is contagious and establishing compassion and kindness as social norms can help spread it. Zaki and his graduate student, Erika Weisz, conducted a study with close to 1,000 seventh graders in the San Francisco Bay Area in which students wrote about why they think empathy is important and useful. Then students read one another’s responses, learning that their peers valued caring as much as they did. The data from this study is preliminary, but students told Weisz and her team that after learning about their peers’ empathy they were also more motivated to be empathetic.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jason Okonofua has been experimenting with similar prosocial interventions with teachers. In a \u003ca href=\"https://mindsetscholarsnetwork.org/research_library/brief-intervention-encourage-empathic-discipline-cuts-suspension-rates-half-among-adolescents/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">small study at five middle schools\u003c/a>, he taught teachers about “empathetic discipline.” They reflected on discipline strategies that would not only punish students, but help them grow. They heard stories of students who’d experienced empathetic discipline and how it helped them. And teachers wrote about strategies they could use in their classrooms. After the training, the empathetic attitudes teachers expressed in their writing seemed to show up in the classroom. Students reported feeling more respected, especially if they had previously been suspended.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While none of these examples are definitive, they hint at the possibility that systems can change as the people within them change their attitudes. Humans conform to social norms – the good ones and the bad ones – and shaping those norms can be a powerful force for promoting empathy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-DspKSYxYDM\u003c/p>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"Empathy is eroding, says Stanford psychologist Jamil Zaki. The average American in 2009 was 30 percent less empathetic than their counterpart thirty years before. But there are ways to strengthen our empathy despite deep divisions in the world today.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1570773656,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":true,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":34,"wordCount":2013},"headData":{"title":"Why Intentionally Building Empathy Is More Important Now Than Ever | KQED","description":"Empathy is eroding, says Stanford psychologist Jamil Zaki. The average American in 2009 was 30 percent less empathetic than their counterpart thirty years before. But there are ways to strengthen our empathy despite deep divisions in the world today.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"54497 https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/?p=54497","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/2019/10/10/why-intentionally-building-empathy-is-more-important-now-than-ever/","disqusTitle":"Why Intentionally Building Empathy Is More Important Now Than Ever","path":"/mindshift/54497/why-intentionally-building-empathy-is-more-important-now-than-ever","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Many people believe that life is a zero-sum game and that the most ruthless people get the furthest. But Jamil Zaki, a Stanford psychologist and author of \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/550616/the-war-for-kindness-by-jamil-zaki/9780451499240/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">The War for Kindness: Building Empathy in a Fractured World\u003c/a>\u003c/em>, says there's a lot of evidence to the contrary.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“It turns out that nice guys finish first in lots of different ways,” Zaki said on \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/forum/2010101872598/empathy-as-a-radical-act\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">KQED’s Forum program\u003c/a>. And, when people are nice, they not only help others, but they help themselves as well. \u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/36448/why-its-imperative-to-teach-empathy-to-boys\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Empathetic people are generally happier\u003c/a>, healthier and more effective at work. And, acting from a place of empathy, he argues, could be just what the world needs at this moment, when division has become the norm.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He points to the case of a former Canadian white supremacist, \u003ca href=\"https://www.theforgivenessproject.com/tony-mcaleer\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Tony McAleer\u003c/a>, who turned to a mentor when he was trying to leave that lifestyle. He confessed his participation in groups like White Aryan Resistance (WAR) and his role as a recruiter for them. He didn’t realize that his mentor, \u003ca href=\"https://fullmontyleadership.com/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Dov Baron\u003c/a>, was Jewish. When McAleer learned this fact, he immediately felt shame and disconnection, but rather than judging him, Baron had compassion for his struggle. Zaki writes about this act of empathy in his book:\u003c/p>\n\u003cblockquote>\u003cp>\"‘Here was this man who loved me and wanted to heal me, and here was I, a person who had once advocated for the annihilation of his people.’ Tony felt he didn’t deserve a shred of compassion from Dov, but Dov extended it nonetheless. This cracked Tony open. He’d created a surface of hatred to cover his shame and loneliness. Once someone accepted him warts and all, he no longer needed it.”\u003c/p>\u003c/blockquote>\n\u003cp>Dov Baron's empathetic response to McAleer’s hate helped set him on a different path. When Baron showed compassion, it made a bigger impact than shunning McAleer. It opened up an opportunity for dialogue and growth. McAleer now runs an organization called \u003ca href=\"https://www.lifeafterhate.org/about-us-page\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Life After Hate\u003c/a> to help other people leave hate groups.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\"I truly feel that the cultural forces that are pushing us apart are so vast and so prevalent that acting with empathy, and trying to connect despite them, is a radical act,\" Zaki said. “It takes pushing back against something in order to reclaim that common humanity.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He points \u003ca href=\"https://faculty.chicagobooth.edu/eob/edobrien_empathyPSPR.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">to evidence\u003c/a> that empathy has been declining over the past 30 years. Psychologists measure empathy through self-reported surveys. Participants rate themselves on a scale of one to five on various questions like: “I often have tender, concerned feelings for people less fortunate than me” or “I try to think about everyone’s side of a disagreement before I make a decision.” The scores are averaged to get a total empathy score.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In 1979, the average American’s total empathy score was a four out of five, a “solid B.” In 2009, thirty years later, the average American scored a three out of five. In practical terms, Zaki says Americans in 2009 are 75-percent less empathetic than their counterparts thirty years ago. Studies like these stoke his concern about empathy erosion.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"'I truly feel that the cultural forces that are pushing us apart are so vast and so prevalent that acting with empathy, and trying to connect despite them, is a radical act. It takes pushing back against something in order to reclaim that common humanity.'","name":"pullquote","attributes":{"named":{"size":"medium","align":"right","citation":"Jamil Zaki, Stanford psychologist and author of \u003cem>The War For Kindness\u003c/em>","label":""},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I don’t argue that what we want is maximal empathy at all times,” Zaki said. “If you felt everyone’s pain at all times, you wouldn’t make it down one block in San Francisco without falling down in a heap.”\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And, he recognizes that there are many professions that experience empathy fatigue, which is why he thinks empathy is a skill and a tool that needs to be cultivated and used at the right times. Part of functioning in this world is to know when to fall back and when to employ empathy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Those in helping professions like teaching, social work, or medicine \u003ca href=\"https://tspace.library.utoronto.ca/bitstream/1807/80997/1/Regehr%20strategies%20for%20reducing%20secondary%20or%20vicarious%20trauma.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">can buffer themselves from burnout\u003c/a> and “compassion fatigue” with self-care strategies, including meditation and \u003ca href=\"https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19293416\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">social support\u003c/a>. A \u003ca href=\"https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/15548253\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">study\u003c/a> of nurses in acute mental health settings found staff support groups helped buffer the nurses, but only if they were structured to minimize negative communication and focused on talking about challenges in constructive ways.\u003cbr>\n\u003cstrong>\u003cbr>\nConcerns About Simplistic Definitions of Empathy\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>English Professor Cris Beam also studies empathy and wrote a book called, \u003cem>\u003ca href=\"http://www.crisbeam.com/i-feel-you\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">I Feel You: The Surprising Power of Extreme Empathy\u003c/a>\u003c/em>. She notes that there are many definitions of empathy. Some of the earliest, and simplest ones, characterize empathy as the ability to “stand in another’s shoes.” \u003ca href=\"https://brenebrown.com/about/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Brené Brown\u003c/a>, who has recently popularized empathy, defines it as \"\u003ca href=\"https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/47502/empathy-is-tough-to-teach-but-is-one-of-the-most-important-life-lessons\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">feeling with people\u003c/a>,\" and notes that it's a \"vulnerable choice\" because it requires a person to tap into something personal that identifies with the struggle of another.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While researching South Africa, Beam came across another definition of empathy she finds powerful: Empathy is a disruption of power. She described the case of \u003ca href=\"https://www.theguardian.com/stage/2014/jun/09/eugene-de-kock-apartheid-a-human-being-died-that-night\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Eugene de Kock\u003c/a>, an apartheid-era assassin responsible for the deaths of dozens of black activists. South African authorities \u003ca href=\"https://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/jan/30/south-africa-eugene-de-kock-released-prime-evil\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">released de Kock\u003c/a> from prison after he had served 20 years, in part because some families of his victims supported the move. They felt de Kock held too much power as the embodiment of evil, and that it kept other South Africans from reflecting on their own role in apartheid.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“We can think about empathy as a way to not only look at the other, but to look at ourselves,” Beam said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Beam contends that empathy is a moral position, not a discrete set of skills, as it is sometimes taught. She says empathy can be strengthened, but before that a person must be grounded in an empathetic understanding that often comes from literature, art and theater. Yale professor \u003ca href=\"https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2013/05/20/the-baby-in-the-well\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Paul Bloom is also critical of the emphasis on empathy\u003c/a>, arguing that it's easier to empathetic towards individuals, leading society to make important policy decisions based on emotion instead of facts.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“I worry about [empathy] being taught as a skill because it should be something of a core identity and a way of moving through the world,” said Beam.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Some of her concern comes from the way that empathy has been co-opted by the business world. Terms like “empathetic design” and “empathetic marketing” repel her. She sees these as attempts to isolate the consumer, and provide them with exactly what they want, when they want it, as antithetical to a core part of deeper empathy – connection.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Could Empathy Change Systems? \u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jamil Zaki agrees with Beam that deep empathy is about connection. But his research shows that empathy can be developed, like a muscle. And, he thinks that could affect the world positively not only at the individual level, but in things like police training.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In his book, Zaki describes how Washington State’s police trainer, Sue Rahr, used the \u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/sf/investigative/2015/12/10/new-style-of-police-training-aims-to-produce-guardians-not-warriors/?utm_term=.78d88f52ab07\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">power of social norms to reduce use-of-force \u003c/a>among police there. She recognized that many police saw themselves as “warriors,” a social norm that could push new recruits who signed up to police with altruistic motives into believing they need to show dominance at all times. Rahr pushed back against that norm, training police to work with the community instead of against them. Psychologists recently chose 300 police officers working in high-need areas of Seattle and ran them through Rahr’s program. They found those officers \u003ca href=\"https://www.ncjrs.gov/pdffiles1/nij/grants/249881.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">used force 30 percent less often\u003c/a> than their peers. And, \u003ca href=\"https://www.seattleu.edu/media/college-of-arts-and-sciences/departments/criminaljustice/crimeandjusticeresearchcenter/documents/Helfgott-and-Hickman-2019_Longitudinal-Continuation-The-Effect-of-Guardian-Focused-Training-for-LE.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">other studies\u003c/a> have shown police who went through the training have more knowledge about how to deal with someone in a behavioral crisis and more emotional intelligence.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Still, Zaki is quick to point out the empathy can’t solve everything. Many of the most pernicious problems are structural, not individual, and no amount of individual empathy can solve them. The policing story is a good example of that – while Rahr’s training takes steps in the right direction it doesn’t solve all the problems with policing, including racial bias. Citizens appreciated attempts to change policing, but were still upset that police officers who did use force were rarely prosecuted.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003cstrong>Stress Makes It Hard To Be Empathetic\u003c/strong>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Stress inhibits people’s ability to be empathetic. Zaki points out irony here. Many psychologists say human connection is one of the best ways to move past pain or trauma, the very things that keep people from opening up to empathy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Often times when we experience stress, we feel that we’re in a rush in order to survive for ourselves, we become untuned to the needs of others,” Zaki said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A \u003ca href=\"https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/creativity-the-art-and-science/201909/how-get-students-persist\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">famous study\u003c/a> conducted in the ‘70s by Princeton researchers John Darley and Daniel Batson asked seminary students to write a sermon about the parable of the good Samaritan. They were then told to go across campus to deliver the sermon. Unbeknownst to the study participants, an actor lurked along the route they would take, and acted as though he required help. Half the participants had been told to take their time getting to the location for the sermon and the other half had been told they were in a rush.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Sixty to 70-percent of the seminary students in the “non-rush” condition stopped to help. Only 10-percent of those in the “rush” condition did so.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>“Sometimes one of the most important things is to cue ourselves in for one moment and recognize that there’s a full person on the other side of this interaction,” Zaki said.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>He sees enormous potential in the internet to connect people, but is also aware that often communication through the internet has the effect of dehumanizing the person on the other side of the exchange. When we interact online, we can’t see the usual cues that indicate to us how the other person is reacting to what we’re saying. That makes it easier to be cruel and to not listen.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But it’s not all bad news. Empathy is contagious and establishing compassion and kindness as social norms can help spread it. Zaki and his graduate student, Erika Weisz, conducted a study with close to 1,000 seventh graders in the San Francisco Bay Area in which students wrote about why they think empathy is important and useful. Then students read one another’s responses, learning that their peers valued caring as much as they did. The data from this study is preliminary, but students told Weisz and her team that after learning about their peers’ empathy they were also more motivated to be empathetic.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Jason Okonofua has been experimenting with similar prosocial interventions with teachers. In a \u003ca href=\"https://mindsetscholarsnetwork.org/research_library/brief-intervention-encourage-empathic-discipline-cuts-suspension-rates-half-among-adolescents/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">small study at five middle schools\u003c/a>, he taught teachers about “empathetic discipline.” They reflected on discipline strategies that would not only punish students, but help them grow. They heard stories of students who’d experienced empathetic discipline and how it helped them. And teachers wrote about strategies they could use in their classrooms. After the training, the empathetic attitudes teachers expressed in their writing seemed to show up in the classroom. Students reported feeling more respected, especially if they had previously been suspended.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>While none of these examples are definitive, they hint at the possibility that systems can change as the people within them change their attitudes. Humans conform to social norms – the good ones and the bad ones – and shaping those norms can be a powerful force for promoting empathy.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutube'>\n \u003cspan class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__embedYoutubeInside'>\n \u003ciframe\n loading='lazy'\n class='utils-parseShortcode-shortcodes-__youtubeShortcode__youtubePlayer'\n type='text/html'\n src='//www.youtube.com/embed/-DspKSYxYDM'\n title='//www.youtube.com/embed/-DspKSYxYDM'\n allowfullscreen='true'\n style='border:0;'>\u003c/iframe>\n \u003c/span>\n \u003c/span>\u003c/p>\u003cp>\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/mindshift/54497/why-intentionally-building-empathy-is-more-important-now-than-ever","authors":["234"],"categories":["mindshift_192"],"tags":["mindshift_21093","mindshift_20699","mindshift_20784","mindshift_1040","mindshift_20512","mindshift_943","mindshift_21159"],"featImg":"mindshift_54500","label":"mindshift"},"mindshift_53476":{"type":"posts","id":"mindshift_53476","meta":{"index":"posts_1591205157","site":"mindshift","id":"53476","score":null,"sort":[1555396321000]},"guestAuthors":[],"slug":"how-selective-empathy-can-chip-away-at-civil-society","title":"How Selective Empathy Can Chip Away At Civil Society","publishDate":1555396321,"format":"standard","headTitle":"MindShift | KQED News","labelTerm":{"site":"mindshift"},"content":"\u003cp>Militia leader Ammon Bundy, famous for leading an armed standoff in Oregon, had a tender moment in November of last year. He \u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2018/11/28/ammon-bundy-breaks-with-trump-anti-migrant-rhetoric-its-all-fear-based/?utm_term=.59f7f37fd3cc\">recorded a Facebook post \u003c/a>saying that perhaps President Trump's characterization of the migrant caravan on the U.S.-Mexico border was somewhat broad. Maybe they weren't all criminals, he said. \"What about those who have come here for reasons of need?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Bundy did not say he was breaking with Trump. He just asked his followers to put themselves in the shoes of \"the fathers, the mothers, the children\" who came to escape violence. It was a call for a truce grounded in empathy, the kind you might hear in a war zone, say, or an Easter Sunday sermon. Still, it was met with a swift and rageful response from his followers, so overwhelming that within days, Bundy decided to \u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2018/12/08/ammon-bundy-spoke-kindly-about-migrant-caravan-backlash-has-him-rethinking-his-supporters/?utm_term=.42aba45a67d9\">quit Facebook.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In an earlier era, Bundy's appeal might have resonated. But he failed to tune in to a critical shift in American culture — one that a handful of researchers have been tracking, with some alarm, for the past decade or so. Americans these days seem to be losing their appetite for empathy, especially the walk-a-mile-in-someone's-shoes Easter Sunday morning kind.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When I was growing up in the '70s, empathy was all the rage. The term was coined in 1908; then, social scientists and psychologists started more aggressively pushing the concept into the culture after World War II, basically out of fear. The idea was that we were all going to kill each other with nuclear weapons — or learn to see the world through each other's eyes. In my elementary school in the 1970s, which was not progressive or mushy in any way, we wrote letters to pretend Russian pen pals to teach us to open our hearts to our enemies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And not just enemies. Civil rights activists had also picked up on the idea. \u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/outlook/2019/02/22/why-empathy-is-key-dismantling-white-racism/?utm_term=.adf0aed7452d\">Kenneth Clark,\u003c/a> a social scientist and civil rights activist, half-jokingly proposed that people in power all be required to take an \"empathy pill\" so they could make better decisions. His hope was that people with power and privilege would one day inhabit the realities of people without power, not from the safe, \u003cem>noblesse oblige\u003c/em> distance of pity, but from the inside. An evolved person was an empathetic person, choosing understanding over fear.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad fullwidth]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then, more than a decade ago, a certain suspicion of empathy started to creep in, particularly among young people. One of the first people to notice was Sara Konrath, an associate professor and researcher at Indiana University. Since the late 1960s, researchers have surveyed young people on their levels of empathy, testing their agreement with statements such as: \"It's not really my problem if others are in trouble and need help\" or \"Before criticizing somebody I try to imagine how I would feel if I were in their place.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Konrath \u003ca href=\"https://www.semanticscholar.org/paper/Changes-in-dispositional-empathy-in-American-over-a-Konrath-O'Brien/e6110444b492accc811291c8954b1f4cf5d349d9\">collected decades of studies\u003c/a> and noticed a very obvious pattern. Starting around 2000, the line starts to slide. More students say it's not their problem to help people in trouble, not their job to see the world from someone else's perspective. By 2009, on all the standard measures, Konrath found, young people on average measure 40 percent less empathetic than my own generation — 40 percent!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's strange to think of empathy – a natural human impulse — as fluctuating in this way, moving up and down like consumer confidence. But that's what happened. Young people just started questioning what my elementary school teachers had taught me.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Their feeling was: Why \u003cem>should\u003c/em> they put themselves in the shoes of someone who was not them, much less someone they thought was harmful? In fact, cutting someone off from empathy was the positive value, a way to make a stand.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So, for example, when the wife of white nationalist Richard Spencer recently told BuzzFeed he had abused her, the question debated on the lefty Internet was: \u003ca href=\"https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/richard-spencer-nina-kouprianova-divorce-abuse_us_5c2fc90ee4b0d75a9830ab69\">Why should we care\u003c/a> that some woman who chose to ally herself with a nasty racist got herself hurt? Why waste empathy on that? (Spencer, in a court filing, \u003ca href=\"https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/talalansari/richard-spencer-divorce-abuse-wife-allegations\">denies all her allegations\u003c/a>.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The new rule for empathy seems to be: reserve it, not for your \"enemies,\" but for the people you believe are hurt, or you have decided need it the most. Empathy, but just for your own team. And empathizing with the other team? That's practically a taboo.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And it turns out that this brand of selective empathy is a powerful force.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the past 20 years, psychologists and neurologists have started to look at how empathy \u003cem>actually \u003c/em>works, in our brains and our hearts, when we're not thinking about it. And one thing they've found is that \"one of the strongest triggers for human empathy is observing some kind of conflict between two other parties,\" says Fritz Breithaupt, a professor at Indiana University who studies empathy. \"Once they take the side, they're drawn into that perspective. And that can lead to very strong empathy and too strong polarization with something you only see this one side and not the other side any longer.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A classic example is the Super Bowl, or any Auburn, Alabama game.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But these days in the news, examples come up every day: the Kavanaugh hearings, emergency funding for a wall, Spike Lee walking out of the Oscars, the Barr report, Kirstjen Nielsen, every third thing on Twitter.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Researchers who study empathy have noticed that it's actually really hard to do what we were striving for in my generation: empathize with people who are different than you are, much less people you don't like. But if researchers set up a conflict, people get into automatic empathy overdrive, with their own team. This new research has scrambled notions of how empathy works as a force in the world. For example, we often think of terrorists as shockingly blind to the suffering of innocents. But Breithaupt and other researchers think of them as classic examples of people afflicted with an \"excess of empathy. They feel the suffering of their people.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Breithaupt called his new book \u003ca href=\"http://www.cornellpress.cornell.edu/book/?GCOI=80140104182850\">The Dark Sides of Empathy\u003c/a>, because there's a point at which empathy doesn't even look like the kind of universal empathy I was taught in school. There is a natural way that empathy gets triggered in the brain — your pain centers light up when you see another person suffering. But out in the world it starts to look more like tribalism, a way to keep reinforcing your own point of view and blocking out any others.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Breithaupt is alarmed at the apparent new virus of selective empathy and how it's deepening divisions. If we embrace it, he says, then \"basically you give up on civil society at that point. You give up on democracy. Because if you feed into this division more and you let it happen, it will become so strong that it becomes dangerous.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We can't return to my generation's era of empathy innocence, because we now know too much about how the force actually works. But we can't give up on empathy either, because empathy is \"90 percent what our life is all about,\" Breithaupt says. \"Without it, we would be just alone.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>[ad floatright]\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In his book Breithaupt proposes an ingenious solution: give up on the idea that when we are \"empathizing\" we are being altruistic, or helping the less fortunate, or in any way doing good. What we can do when we do empathy, proposes Fritz, is help ourselves. We can learn to see the world through the eyes of a migrant child and a militia leader and a Russian pen pal purely so we can expand our own imaginations, and make our own minds richer. It's selfish empathy. Not saintly, but better than being alone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=The+End+Of+Empathy&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/div>\n\n","blocks":[],"excerpt":"It's hard to be civil without being empathetic. But researchers say our natural instinct for empathy may be going out of style.","status":"publish","parent":0,"modified":1555670496,"stats":{"hasAudio":false,"hasVideo":false,"hasChartOrMap":false,"iframeSrcs":[],"hasGoogleForm":false,"hasGallery":false,"hasHearkenModule":false,"hasPolis":false,"paragraphCount":22,"wordCount":1336},"headData":{"title":"How Selective Empathy Can Chip Away At Civil Society | KQED","description":"It's hard to be civil without being empathetic. But researchers say our natural instinct for empathy may be going out of style.","ogTitle":"","ogDescription":"","ogImgId":"","twTitle":"","twDescription":"","twImgId":""},"disqusIdentifier":"53476 https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/?p=53476","disqusUrl":"https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/2019/04/15/how-selective-empathy-can-chip-away-at-civil-society/","disqusTitle":"How Selective Empathy Can Chip Away At Civil Society","nprByline":"Hanna Rosin","nprImageAgency":"Christina Chung for NPR","nprStoryId":"712249664","nprApiLink":"http://api.npr.org/query?id=712249664&apiKey=MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004","nprHtmlLink":"https://www.npr.org/2019/04/15/712249664/the-end-of-empathy?ft=nprml&f=712249664","nprRetrievedStory":"1","nprPubDate":"Mon, 15 Apr 2019 05:43:00 -0400","nprStoryDate":"Mon, 15 Apr 2019 05:00:00 -0400","nprLastModifiedDate":"Mon, 15 Apr 2019 05:43:51 -0400","path":"/mindshift/53476/how-selective-empathy-can-chip-away-at-civil-society","audioTrackLength":null,"parsedContent":[{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003cp>Militia leader Ammon Bundy, famous for leading an armed standoff in Oregon, had a tender moment in November of last year. He \u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2018/11/28/ammon-bundy-breaks-with-trump-anti-migrant-rhetoric-its-all-fear-based/?utm_term=.59f7f37fd3cc\">recorded a Facebook post \u003c/a>saying that perhaps President Trump's characterization of the migrant caravan on the U.S.-Mexico border was somewhat broad. Maybe they weren't all criminals, he said. \"What about those who have come here for reasons of need?\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Bundy did not say he was breaking with Trump. He just asked his followers to put themselves in the shoes of \"the fathers, the mothers, the children\" who came to escape violence. It was a call for a truce grounded in empathy, the kind you might hear in a war zone, say, or an Easter Sunday sermon. Still, it was met with a swift and rageful response from his followers, so overwhelming that within days, Bundy decided to \u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2018/12/08/ammon-bundy-spoke-kindly-about-migrant-caravan-backlash-has-him-rethinking-his-supporters/?utm_term=.42aba45a67d9\">quit Facebook.\u003c/a>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In an earlier era, Bundy's appeal might have resonated. But he failed to tune in to a critical shift in American culture — one that a handful of researchers have been tracking, with some alarm, for the past decade or so. Americans these days seem to be losing their appetite for empathy, especially the walk-a-mile-in-someone's-shoes Easter Sunday morning kind.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>When I was growing up in the '70s, empathy was all the rage. The term was coined in 1908; then, social scientists and psychologists started more aggressively pushing the concept into the culture after World War II, basically out of fear. The idea was that we were all going to kill each other with nuclear weapons — or learn to see the world through each other's eyes. In my elementary school in the 1970s, which was not progressive or mushy in any way, we wrote letters to pretend Russian pen pals to teach us to open our hearts to our enemies.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And not just enemies. Civil rights activists had also picked up on the idea. \u003ca href=\"https://www.washingtonpost.com/outlook/2019/02/22/why-empathy-is-key-dismantling-white-racism/?utm_term=.adf0aed7452d\">Kenneth Clark,\u003c/a> a social scientist and civil rights activist, half-jokingly proposed that people in power all be required to take an \"empathy pill\" so they could make better decisions. His hope was that people with power and privilege would one day inhabit the realities of people without power, not from the safe, \u003cem>noblesse oblige\u003c/em> distance of pity, but from the inside. An evolved person was an empathetic person, choosing understanding over fear.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"fullwidth"},"numeric":["fullwidth"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Then, more than a decade ago, a certain suspicion of empathy started to creep in, particularly among young people. One of the first people to notice was Sara Konrath, an associate professor and researcher at Indiana University. Since the late 1960s, researchers have surveyed young people on their levels of empathy, testing their agreement with statements such as: \"It's not really my problem if others are in trouble and need help\" or \"Before criticizing somebody I try to imagine how I would feel if I were in their place.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Konrath \u003ca href=\"https://www.semanticscholar.org/paper/Changes-in-dispositional-empathy-in-American-over-a-Konrath-O'Brien/e6110444b492accc811291c8954b1f4cf5d349d9\">collected decades of studies\u003c/a> and noticed a very obvious pattern. Starting around 2000, the line starts to slide. More students say it's not their problem to help people in trouble, not their job to see the world from someone else's perspective. By 2009, on all the standard measures, Konrath found, young people on average measure 40 percent less empathetic than my own generation — 40 percent!\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>It's strange to think of empathy – a natural human impulse — as fluctuating in this way, moving up and down like consumer confidence. But that's what happened. Young people just started questioning what my elementary school teachers had taught me.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Their feeling was: Why \u003cem>should\u003c/em> they put themselves in the shoes of someone who was not them, much less someone they thought was harmful? In fact, cutting someone off from empathy was the positive value, a way to make a stand.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>So, for example, when the wife of white nationalist Richard Spencer recently told BuzzFeed he had abused her, the question debated on the lefty Internet was: \u003ca href=\"https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/richard-spencer-nina-kouprianova-divorce-abuse_us_5c2fc90ee4b0d75a9830ab69\">Why should we care\u003c/a> that some woman who chose to ally herself with a nasty racist got herself hurt? Why waste empathy on that? (Spencer, in a court filing, \u003ca href=\"https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/talalansari/richard-spencer-divorce-abuse-wife-allegations\">denies all her allegations\u003c/a>.)\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>The new rule for empathy seems to be: reserve it, not for your \"enemies,\" but for the people you believe are hurt, or you have decided need it the most. Empathy, but just for your own team. And empathizing with the other team? That's practically a taboo.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>And it turns out that this brand of selective empathy is a powerful force.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In the past 20 years, psychologists and neurologists have started to look at how empathy \u003cem>actually \u003c/em>works, in our brains and our hearts, when we're not thinking about it. And one thing they've found is that \"one of the strongest triggers for human empathy is observing some kind of conflict between two other parties,\" says Fritz Breithaupt, a professor at Indiana University who studies empathy. \"Once they take the side, they're drawn into that perspective. And that can lead to very strong empathy and too strong polarization with something you only see this one side and not the other side any longer.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>A classic example is the Super Bowl, or any Auburn, Alabama game.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>But these days in the news, examples come up every day: the Kavanaugh hearings, emergency funding for a wall, Spike Lee walking out of the Oscars, the Barr report, Kirstjen Nielsen, every third thing on Twitter.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Researchers who study empathy have noticed that it's actually really hard to do what we were striving for in my generation: empathize with people who are different than you are, much less people you don't like. But if researchers set up a conflict, people get into automatic empathy overdrive, with their own team. This new research has scrambled notions of how empathy works as a force in the world. For example, we often think of terrorists as shockingly blind to the suffering of innocents. But Breithaupt and other researchers think of them as classic examples of people afflicted with an \"excess of empathy. They feel the suffering of their people.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Breithaupt called his new book \u003ca href=\"http://www.cornellpress.cornell.edu/book/?GCOI=80140104182850\">The Dark Sides of Empathy\u003c/a>, because there's a point at which empathy doesn't even look like the kind of universal empathy I was taught in school. There is a natural way that empathy gets triggered in the brain — your pain centers light up when you see another person suffering. But out in the world it starts to look more like tribalism, a way to keep reinforcing your own point of view and blocking out any others.\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>Breithaupt is alarmed at the apparent new virus of selective empathy and how it's deepening divisions. If we embrace it, he says, then \"basically you give up on civil society at that point. You give up on democracy. Because if you feed into this division more and you let it happen, it will become so strong that it becomes dangerous.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>We can't return to my generation's era of empathy innocence, because we now know too much about how the force actually works. But we can't give up on empathy either, because empathy is \"90 percent what our life is all about,\" Breithaupt says. \"Without it, we would be just alone.\"\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>\u003c/p>\u003c/div>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}},{"type":"component","content":"","name":"ad","attributes":{"named":{"label":"floatright"},"numeric":["floatright"]}},{"type":"contentString","content":"\u003cdiv class=\"post-body\">\u003cp>\u003c/p>\n\u003cp>In his book Breithaupt proposes an ingenious solution: give up on the idea that when we are \"empathizing\" we are being altruistic, or helping the less fortunate, or in any way doing good. What we can do when we do empathy, proposes Fritz, is help ourselves. We can learn to see the world through the eyes of a migrant child and a militia leader and a Russian pen pal purely so we can expand our own imaginations, and make our own minds richer. It's selfish empathy. Not saintly, but better than being alone.\u003c/p>\n\u003cdiv class=\"fullattribution\">Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.\u003cimg src=\"https://www.google-analytics.com/__utm.gif?utmac=UA-5828686-4&utmdt=The+End+Of+Empathy&utme=8(APIKey)9(MDAxOTAwOTE4MDEyMTkxMDAzNjczZDljZA004)\">\u003c/div>\n\n\u003c/div>\u003c/p>","attributes":{"named":{},"numeric":[]}}],"link":"/mindshift/53476/how-selective-empathy-can-chip-away-at-civil-society","authors":["byline_mindshift_53476"],"categories":["mindshift_192"],"tags":["mindshift_20699","mindshift_20784","mindshift_1040"],"featImg":"mindshift_53477","label":"mindshift"}},"programsReducer":{"possible":{"id":"possible","title":"Possible","info":"Possible is hosted by entrepreneur Reid Hoffman and writer Aria Finger. Together in Possible, Hoffman and Finger lead enlightening discussions about building a brighter collective future. The show features interviews with visionary guests like Trevor Noah, Sam Altman and Janette Sadik-Khan. Possible paints an optimistic portrait of the world we can create through science, policy, business, art and our shared humanity. It asks: What if everything goes right for once? How can we get there? 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You can also visit the MindShift website for episodes and supplemental blog posts or tweet us \u003ca href=\"https://twitter.com/MindShiftKQED\">@MindShiftKQED\u003c/a> or visit us at \u003ca href=\"/mindshift\">MindShift.KQED.org\u003c/a>","imageSrc":"https://cdn.kqed.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/Mindshift-Podcast-Tile-703x703-1.jpg","imageAlt":"KQED MindShift: How We Will Learn","officialWebsiteLink":"/mindshift/","meta":{"site":"news","source":"kqed","order":"2"},"link":"/podcasts/mindshift","subscribe":{"apple":"https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mindshift-podcast/id1078765985","google":"https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5tZWdhcGhvbmUuZm0vS1FJTkM1NzY0NjAwNDI5","npr":"https://www.npr.org/podcasts/464615685/mind-shift-podcast","stitcher":"https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/kqed/stories-teachers-share","spotify":"https://open.spotify.com/show/0MxSpNYZKNprFLCl7eEtyx"}},"morning-edition":{"id":"morning-edition","title":"Morning Edition","info":"\u003cem>Morning Edition\u003c/em> takes listeners around the country and the world with multi-faceted stories and commentaries every weekday. 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