In a world of small plates and share plates, it's typical that meals are ordered in a way that is atypical of traditional dining. I frankly can't remember the last time that I was with a group who each ordered a salad, an entree and a dessert without sharing or splitting plates. More typical these days is a meal that I had Monday night at A16: two of us shared an appetizer, a pizza, a small pasta and three sides.

"How would you like that to come out?" most servers ask me. My typical answer? "However you'd like, just not all at once." I say this last point with emphasis and look them straight in the eye. A quick way to get me in a bad mood is to deliver so many plates to my table that we are juggling plates and stressed to get plates off the table to make room.

I find that most places I go to are very good at asking the question about coursing. But whether it's followed is a gamble. The successfully coursed meal at A16 came out in three rounds -- the appetizer and a side, the pizza, and then the pasta and two sides.

One night at a Valencia street restaurant known for great cocktails and excellent food, we ordered a similarly random meal. That night, I was looking forward to a leisurely paced meal and we had some ideas of how the meal should come out due to wine pairings with different dishes. We talked to the server about it and he even went so far as to tell us when he would have the kitchen "fire" certain courses, and spent a couple of minutes confirming the order with us.

The meal started to come out immediately and too quickly. The courses were completely confused, and the server was notably absent. The food was delicious. The meal pacing left us agitated and annoyed. What could have been a really stellar experience was made only above average due to the way that our food was presented to us.

The worst example of coursing recently was at a newly three-star restaurant in SOMA where the plates were too large for a two-top and came out all at once. We had to move some plates to an adjacent table just to make room to eat. It would have been comical if I wasn't so annoyed. When we mentioned the problem to the server, she just said "Oh, that's the way the kitchen does it sometimes."

It's time for San Franciscans to stop letting this sloppy coursing slide. Gone are the days of an entree with a choice of soup or salad, baked potato or fries. At least in San Francisco, we've been seeing nontraditional menus for several years now. And managers need to be training servers and kitchens on how to handle orders in order to make the experience comfortable for the diner. Restaurants must evaluate every order and consider it on its own for the best pacing and coursing. This may sound like nitpicking, but we are lucky to live in a city where we have numerous choices for excellent food -- it affords us the leisure of making coursing and pacing a deciding factor when choosing a restaurant.

Hors d'oeuvres. Tapas. Appetizers. Small plates. There are many names and countries of origin for those little bites of deliciousness. From canapés and dips to dumplings and kabobs, the small plate is varied and versatile. Although appetizers were once used primarily to sate guests until the main course arrived, they have more recently achieved a higher status in the entertaining world. I have attended everything from cozy gatherings to large weddings where only small plates were served. This is always fine with me, as I love variety and a dinner made up of appetizers offers just that.

In honor of Oscar night Sunday, I wanted to share a couple of my own favorite quick and easy small plate recipes. Although I think I’ve only seen one movie up for the Best Picture award (this is the sad state of movie-going affairs in our house after our two favorite babysitters left for college), I see Sunday as an excuse to curl up on the couch with a couple of my favorite hors d'oeuvres and a glass of wine while my daughters comment on the red carpet fashions.

The first recipe is for a white cannellini bean dip. This is my standard appetizer when we have unexpected guests--I can make it in less than five minutes and always have all the ingredients on hand. It’s similar to hummus in texture, but has more Italian than Middle Eastern seasonings. You can make it with or without hot pepper sauce, so you can customize the spices to your own taste. I like to serve this dish with bruschetta, but crackers, pita chips, or bread sticks would work just as well.

The second recipe was created by mistake. I wanted to try out a new appetizer recipe but forgot to look at it and write down the ingredients before I went to the store. I knew the general idea was stuffed dates, but that was it. After wandering around the store and picking out ingredients for the varied dishes I was making that evening for guests, I went home and saw that other than the dates, my groceries didn't include any of the required ingredients. After a good laugh with my husband about my inability to take a list with me to the grocery story, I immediately got to work to see if I could concoct something with what I had bought. I had some goat cheese on hand for a salad, but decided to use it instead as a stuffing for the dates because I thought the velvety rich texture would counteract the sweet denseness of the fruit. I had also gone to the deli section to buy prosciutto for sandwiches the next day. I had plenty, so decided to use a few slices in the hopes that the salty flavor of the cured ham would accent the other sweet and creamy flavors. After tasting one of my new creations, I realized each flavor was too distinct. In the hopes of melding the tastes of dates, cheese, and cured pork together, I set everything in a 350-degree oven for about five minutes. The result was what my friend Jeff called “pork candy”: goat cheese oozing into the sweet date meat with a crisp salty finish. Just the thing when watching those starlets ham it up on the red carpet.

Cannellini Bean Dip

Ingredients
1 can cannellini beans drained and rinsed
1/4 cup olive oil
1/2 - 3/4 teaspoon salt
Dash of pepper
2 Tbsp chopped fresh parsley
2 Tbsp lemon juice
A few dashes of hot sauce
1/4 cup cooked or raw red onion

Preparation
1. Place all the ingredients in a food processor and puree.
2. Taste and add more salt, pepper, lemon juice or hot sauce as desired.
3. Place in a bowl and drizzle the top with olive oil and a sprig of parsley.
4. Serve with bruschetta, crackers, pita chips, or bread sticks.

Note: I am not a big fan of raw onion so I like to sauté the red onion in a drizzle of olive oil for a minute or two before I add it to the rest of the ingredients. If I get an exceptionally sweet onion, I’ll skip the sautéing process.

Serves 4-6 people

Pork Candy (a.k.a. Stuffed Dates with Goat Cheese and Prosciutto)

Ingredients
12 fresh dates
2 ounces goat cheese
6 slices of prosciutto cut in half
Olive oil

Preparation
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2. Pit dates and remove stems.
3. Spoon enough goat cheese into each date to fill the centers.
4. Wrap dates with between a quarter to a half slice of prosciutto each (depending on the size of the dates).
5. Lay stuffed and wrapped dates on a baking tray.
6. Drizzle with olive oil.
7. Bake for 5 minutes, or until prosciutto crisps up.
8. Serve warm.

Serves 4-6 people