When I had more than one good friend call me up to ask if any of this actually happened (people who have known me for 20 years), I realized I should have added some sort of tag at the end stating that the only thing real about this post is the existence of such products as sterling silver champagne straws and $8 ice cubes. It’s just that I hate having to state what is, at least to me, the obvious.

A few months ago, a Gläce vendor left a few of these ice spheres for our bartenders to try out. My friend Tony poured a drink over a piece for our friend Eric, we watched the sphere “crackle and spider”, talked about how ridiculous we thought they were, etc., and I snapped a couple of photos with my iPhone. Then I promptly forgot about them.

I had also forgotten my promise to write about them, so when Tony reminded me, I said I’d give it a go.

Of course, to write something as simple as “Look at how stupid these things are” would have been easy and very, very boring. I thought to myself, “Who in God’s name would actually spend $8 on an ice cube?” I went to the website, saw an absurd set of photos starring Playboy Playmates sucking on them and D-list celebrities with D-cup brassieres posing with them. In disposable plastic cups, no less.

I thought it would be more entertaining to pretend I was one of those types of people. That’s all.

Andrew– I am therefore very, very flattered that you found me to be a shallow, insufferable jerk, since that’s exactly what I was going for. I do, however, think you owe my editor an apology, because she’s cool enough to let me do something different every once in a while. She’s even cool enough not to censor insulting comments that take low aim at her.